Is it normal to want my girlfriend to hurt me?

27% Normal
6 Comments

My girlfriend and I have been together for a long time. She's the most wonderful person I have ever met, and has never done anything harmful or abusive to me. Recently my depression came back in full swing, and I haven't been able to cope with it without being with her. I'm constantly trying to be with her, or talk to her so I'm not alone, and get really sad when I have to spend time apart from her. (She is literally the only person I have in my life right now) Now I feel like I'm too clingy and irritating. I feel terribly empty and I really just want her to scream at me, hit me or smack me across the face, or something. I feel terrible feeling like this because I know how terrible and toxic domestic abuse is, but I just want her to get angry at me so badly (preferably get angry at me for being clingy, annoying, etc.) I struggled with self harm in the past, and I never been physically abused in my life (aside from the spankings from my childhood) so I don't understand and can't even begin to comprehend why I would ever want this. Is this just another way of self harm? Is it self harm to wish pain upon yourself that you yourself don't actually inflict? Am I too attached or clingy?

Voting Results
27% Normal
Based on 56 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Ellenna
    8 years ago

    You need to get some treatment for your depression before you drive your girlfriend away with your obsessive dependency. It's not healthy to expect so much from one person

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  • Steve2.00
    8 years ago

    You're a masochistic freak, congratulations! We needed more of your kind in the world!

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  • RainbowFlash
    8 years ago

    It seems like this may be one of a few things..

    1. You define love by her actions, if she punishes you, she must love you.

    2. You feel you need to be punished for your behaviour, you have low self esteem so doubt yourself.

    3. You want to fuck everything up. You are so used to things going wrong that you are going to create the situation for things to go wrong so you can say, "See, it always goes wrong". Self fulfilling prophecy.

    You need to do some serious thinking about what you want, who you are and why she is with you.. The fact she is still with you should tell you all you need to know.

    She loves you and is happy with you. Go talk to her about this. Not us.

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  • mysistersshadow
    8 years ago

    I think its still self harm if you bring it on to yourself. I'm really sorry you feel like that just know somewhere out there someone else feels just like you so your really not alone ever.

    And the thing about getting high is it doesn't last you always come back to you. I do agree its nice to take a vacation sometimes. But the last time I did after like a 2 week binge I found I weighed 106 which the most I ever weighed so then I cried about that and everything that is wrong about me came crashing back in and was worse so I don't think that is a good long term way to fix your issue.

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  • Arm0se
    8 years ago

    Wow. That's fucked up. I thought I was the only one that thought like that.

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  • yu-gi-ohChampion25
    8 years ago

    about the cutting, if it got you high or released chemicals in your brain to get you high it would be worth it, any feelings of euphoria or relief is so fucking small.

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