Is it normal to think racist words don't necessarily make someone racist?

Last night I was at a public meeting as a consultant, and an 70 year-old farmer dropped the n-word. Not in a derogatory context, but as a now mostly-obsolete colloquialism. (Particular to old farmers as far as I can tell).

The proper response is, of course, to ignore this. But the recent Deen controversy made me take notice.

I doubt this guy is racist, as this is an ethnically homogeneous rural area where pretty much everyone is Caucasian of eastern-European ancestry. To him I think it's just another word without any real meaning.

I am far more interested in the things people mean, rather than what they say. A person can say something obscene and offensive without using any taboo words at all. Or a person can say a taboo word as an expletive without meaning anything at all.

Referring to someone by a name that is derogatory isn't right, but it isn't necessarily the same as being derogatory to all people who have been called that name. Negatively referring to someone as sinister is not a slam on left-handed people, nor is calling someone a 'bastard' expressing a negative opinion of all people born of unwed parents. (Though literally it is).

As such, I think people who use taboo words should be treated as though they had used any other taboo expletive, unless they are habitually using it to degrade or persecute. In which they should be treated as racist - the same as anyone who shows racist behavior or attitudes without using taboo words.