Is it normal to think a cheater is an overall piece of sh*t?
I have this chick friend who has a boyfriend of several years. She seemed like an honest, forthright kind of person at first, and I really love those qualities. She tells me a lot about her life and whatever drama is going on in it, and a few weeks ago she started dropping hints that she had a crush on somebody. I thought, alright, sometimes people in relationships develop little crushes on others, but as long as it doesn't go anywhere it's alright. Later though the whole story unraveled, and it turns out she had an affair with this person. And she's had several affairs throughout her relationship that her boyfriend knows nothing about. AND she plans to continue having affairs, even after moving in with him- basically up until she's married.
This really shocked and disappointed me, because I see it as a total lack of integrity. You might say "Well as long as it doesn't affect you, don't judge her on it!" But before you go there, think of how YOU'D feel if it were your partner. As far as how this affects me as a friend, the way I see it is this person is willfully deceiving someone who really loves her and has committed 4 YEARS of his life with her, without any remorse at all. She's dishonest, and remorseless. Someone who cares only about fulfulling her own desires, and "what he doesn't know can't hurt him."
I think those kind of traits (dishonesty, selfishness, a lack of concerns for others and no feeling of accountability for actions), can definitely trickle down into other areas of her life, such as friendship, work, even parenting. That's why I see someone like this as an overall shitty person.
Anyone agree? Disagree? Tell me why.