Is it normal to not leave him even though

13% Normal
9 Comments

4 year relationship. He decided to do a three month programme abroad. So, we are the kind of couple which never drinks, smokes or anything like that. We never watch porn. Both of us are extremly possesive.
But when he left for the 3 months. He just vanished. Completely. And when he came back, he accepted that he had done drugs, smoked, partied with girls and did not hesitate while touching them.
Now whenever I am with him all I think about is if has done what we are doing with others. And I am really screwed up.

Voting Results
13% Normal
Based on 8 votes (1 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 9 )
  • thegypsysailor
    9 years ago

    Time to leave. Whatever you had, he has changed, but you got left behind.
    The space between you is only going to get bigger and you are only going to feel more and more left out.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2
      -
    • 18plus1
      9 years ago

      Very true. thankyou.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • CheyChey
    9 years ago

    The heart wants it wants irrational or not but why would you stay with someone who would ruin a four year union by touching random girls just because he was away. The fact that he didn't even hesitate is enough to let you know that he'd do it again if given the opportunity. Parts of his personality are starting to reveal themselves and it's up to you to decide if you can deal. Faithfulness isn't based on geography. Being away is no excuse for acting like a slut. You deserve better than that, someone who respects you enough to keep his hands to himself or better yet end things when he can't keep his end of the bargain because then you'll have dodged a bullet.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    2
    2
      -
    • 18plus1
      9 years ago

      Thankyou very much. That makes a lot of sense to me. I think I will end the relationship soon. I took a step last night after posting this.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • MissDethstar
    9 years ago

    I'm not here to justify what he did but perhaps that is truly what he wanted to do for a long time. I don't know how was your relationship but you mentioned being very possessive, maybe while being abroad he felt freedom for the first time. He might have felt no obligation to stay true to his words because he was away so he ended up doing drugs,alcohol and etc. I don't know about staying with him, especially if he cheated without hesitation. If he doesn't care about your feeling that much it's not healthy for you. If you want to stay with him, are you ready to forgive him and take the chance that it might happen again.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
      -
    • 18plus1
      9 years ago

      But even now he is very possessive. As in he still has a problem if I go out without him or wear clothes any lesser than a jeanse and t shirt. Now, if my being possessive was the problem, I asked him this directly, we could be like others. But he denied completly. We are going to go to different countries for a few months soon. I am scared.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    If you can't make new life for your self
    than your going to continue living the
    same pattern of life..I would say in this
    situation there is something your hiding
    about your self or afraid to move on in
    life yes even thou he did this stuff your
    obsessed with him

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • TheInsignificantGirl
    9 years ago

    Umm, talk to him? If you can't talk to him freely about anything, especially important stuff, you two shouldn't be together. Or you should start now. Communication is very important, especially when one of you is confused or upset by the other's actions.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
      -
    • 18plus1
      9 years ago

      Communication is not a problem! Thanks anyway !

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0