Is it normal to have growing feelings for my daughter?

26% Normal
13 Comments

When I was 21 I got a girl pregnant, she was my friend and I had known her for a long time from school, she was 18 when I knocked her up and when I found out she was pregnant I told her it was an accident and that she should get an abortion, but she wanted to keep the baby so I left her. A year later she died in a car crash after being drunk the night with friends. I felt really bad and felt like I had responsibility to make sure the baby would get a good life after that. The baby was with her step-sister but I said that I was the father and that I needed to take care of the little kid. Now the little girl is 6 and I don't have the best paying job so sometimes she stays with my parents and we all help to care of her. The thing is that I had depression and suicidal thoughts for a while so I'm not in the best place mentally, but I'm starting to see her mother's face in my daughter. I don't have a girlfriend or friends so I'm really lonely a lot of the time, and it's just me and her a lot. I like to really spend with her and I realize that the kind of affection and attachment that I'm growing for her is something beyond a normal father daughter relationship. I really love her a lot, but I'm kind of starting to get concerned that someday I won't be able to control myself and will just touch her inappropriately or do something that I'll later regret, something like that. I just need some help to fight my loneliness and depression, and I feel like I got to do it at least for her sake if not for anyone else including me.

Voting Results
26% Normal
Based on 62 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • Short4Words
    8 years ago

    The fact that you are worried about it means it probably wont happen. It's not like you'll just slip one day and realize you've become a child molester.

    It's important for your daughter to not be confused as well so I think it's best that you start making some more friends and give yourself a little space from your girl. Also I'm sure plenty of chicks will find the whole dad thing sexy, especially if you're good with her.

    Best of luck.

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  • dindu_nuffin
    8 years ago

    Somebody call CPS fast

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  • CDmale4fem
    8 years ago

    When you look at her how can you not see the innocence, the love she probably feels for you as her daddy. How would you feel if somebody from across town took that away from her ? You are the one she looks to for protection from people like that. Put on your big girl panties and realize you are a father, a protector, a friend to her, and her physical and emotional support and well being. Dont you let demon thoughts control you. That will destroy the bond you are creating in her early yrs while shes growing up. Be the standup guy that can raise a daughter who knows how to scream for help if needed, she can know right from wrong, she will make wise smart and intelligent decisions later in life so she wont be 13 and pregnant, or end up dating some crack head that will smack her around and threaten her more if she tries to leave him.
    Thats why its important for you to do the things she needs and will learn from. And not learning things that will scar her for life. Look at her the next time she comes to sit on your lap and watch tv or just tells you she loves you. How could you ever hurt her. ? Stay strong, do the right things. If not and I knew you, I would come kick your ass if you hurt her.

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  • 53739
    8 years ago

    For anyone who thinks I'm a pedophile, I'm not. Sometimes I feel pretty guilty about not having been there to support the girl I got pregnant, and maybe if I had been there for her then she would not have gotten drunk and been involved in the car crash. Because of that guilt, I find myself feeling towards my daughter some of what I should have felt for her mother. It's basically my mind's way of trying to make myself feel better about having been a jerk back then, kind of like trying to come sate for the past. I have nothing but pure unconditional love for my daughter btw.

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  • klebo
    8 years ago

    You sound a little like me....I wasn't getting emotional or physical love from my wife and ended up falling for my stepdaughter (exstepdaughter now) we shared a lot together and got to find out a lot about her as we connected she was 11 at the time and wanted more from her as to this day I still have strong feelings for her, but if anything happens let her make the moves, you can love her and be there for her and maybe a more flirtatious than normal and do things for her to show her you care more about her than just a daughter, feel free to masterbate thinking of her,but again let her make the moves,maybe when time is right leave door open a little while getting dressed or when you rub one off make it so see might hear you and she is curious to what it's all about, good luck and let me know if this all makes sense

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    • GUP1234
      8 years ago

      Hello Humbert Humbert.

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  • Couman
    8 years ago

    You don't need to worry about or be ashamed of your feelings, just make sure your actions stay proper.

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    • RoseIsabella
      8 years ago

      If his feelings are or become sexual then he should be ashamed. All pedophiles should be ashamed, what they feel is wrong. They are not entitled to their feelings.

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      • Redcoats
        8 years ago

        A million times this ^

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          8 years ago

          It's not that I'm a pedophile but somehow I feel a little guilty about not being there for the girl I got pregnant, and that she was drunk and got involved in a car crash, I feel like if I had been there to support her then she never would have been in that situation. And because of that I find myself feeling for the girl some of what I should have felt for the mother. It's my mind's way of trying to make myself feel better about being a jerk back then, like trying to compensate for the past. However I only have pure unconditional love for my daughter.

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        • RoseIsabella
          8 years ago

          (((HUGS))!!!
          ♡☆♡☆
          Paw Up, my friend!

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      • Anonymous Post Author
        8 years ago

        It's not that I think I'm a pedophile but because I abandoned the girl I got pregnant and she was later drunk and go involved in a car crash, I feel partly guilty for not being there to support her so maybe if I was there for her she never would have been in that situation. Also because of that I find myself feeling towards my daughter some of what I should have been feeling towards her mother. It's my brain's way to reassure myself that I wasn't a jerk back then when I actually was, aka a way to compensate for the past. Doesn't make it better but it is what it is. I have nothing but pure unconditional love for my daughter.

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      • Anonymous Post Author
        8 years ago

        I'm not a pedophile but I'm really emotionally attached to my daughter. I feel like because I abandoned the girl I got pregnant, that was somehow connected to her getting drunk and being involved in that car crash. I felt like if I could have been there for her then she never would have been in that situation. And I realize now that I was a huge jerk for doing that, I feel guilty about it, but my daughter doesn't know that, she only knows bits and pieces here and there of what happened, maybe someday I'll have to sit down and have a good talk. I feel this need or desire to protect her but I don't want to be overbearing. And even if it's wrong I find myself feeling things towards her that I should've felt for her mother, in my mind it's just a way to make myself feel like I wasn't a jerk back then when I was, aka to compensate for my past. It's nothing but pure unconditional love I got for her. Hope this makes sense.

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