Is it normal to feel bad about this?

88% Normal
8 Comments

My ex and I separated a few months ago and we still talk all the time over Skype. Well she had a friend over and they were talking. I ended up finding out about all of the guys she's been sleeping with after she left me and a lot of other things I don't think I was supposed to hear but the friend brought up...

I tried to get the friend to stop talking, but it didn't work. I ended up hanging up and saying I'd call later or something then got off Skype. Something just hurts inside. I don't even know what it is it just does.

Is this normal? Has anyone else been though something similar? I'll take any sort of help I can get, though I'd really really rather us stay friends.

Voting Results
88% Normal
Based on 17 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • brian242
    8 years ago

    Is this normal?
    Hell yeah. It's called hurt/pain/sadness/anger could be any or all or a mix of those.

    I recommend reading about Radical Honesty by Brad Blanton for dealing with issues like this. In a nutshell find out all those details in explicit detail so you don't imagine it worse, and cry and yell at your ex when the feelings come up. If you express it, the feelings will eventually subside, but you have to be willing to feel them. Don't ignore those feelings or you will feel pain and have trust issues in future relationships. And you must do this in person with eye contact, not over the phone.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago

      I already have trust issues from the past I still haven't gotten over. Will this make it worse? I tried asking but she became really defensive, which is why I don't think I was supposed to know. I'm not mad at her at all, it's not her fault. It's feels like combination of just about everything but anger and happiness actually. I have a very hard time expressing my emotions with my voice. Any suggestions? I know these are a lot of tough questions to answer, but I don't know what else to do... I will try your other suggestions though.

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      • thegypsysailor
        8 years ago

        How can who she fucks after leaving you have ANYTHING to do with your trust issues?
        Sounds to me like you need to stop talking to this ex and go find yourself a new girl.

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  • MR.mr
    8 years ago

    I understand and sypathize

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  • Mario24
    8 years ago

    It is normal to feel bad to hear this. It is a primitive behaviour of human beings as we stay with our partner to raise our children since a long time. I will suggest you to stay away from such news. do not think about her personal life and have a nice girlfriend for yourself.
    Wish you a good and happy life.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago

      If it happens again I'll ask her not to speak of it in front of me.

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  • Spider-Man
    8 years ago

    they say that to every guy though as if they like you more

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago

      She let me hear all those awful things because she likes me more? I don't understand.

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