Is it normal to feel awkward around couples?

63% Normal
8 Comments

I am a woman and most of my friends are in a couple. It doesn't matter if the couple is straight, lesbian, gay or even a virtual couple - I always end up feeling awkward around them at some point. I tend to feel more comfortable talking to the male/masculine counterpart, but then I feel obligated to side with the female/feminine counterpart and it leaves me feeling torn and acting somewhat fake. If the couple gets into an argument I usually agree with the guy, but stand up for the woman. I also have anxiety about guys in relationships becoming attracted to me and their woman getting jealous. I don't want to disrespect anybody but it's so much easier to keep a conversation going with guys. When I was younger females really intimidated me. I feel like I'll never be truly accepted by other women.

Voting Results
63% Normal
Based on 16 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Unimportant
    9 years ago

    Seems like a lot of different questions.

    IIN to feel awkward around couples? - Yes, I would think so. I know I often do.

    IIN to express gender-based solidarity out of a feeling of obligation? - I'd have to say no.

    Experienced intimidation and lack of acceptance among women - probably normal in the sense of common, but not exactly healthy, in my view.

    That being said, you should know, that I'm not qualified to give you any advice whatsoever. So my opinion doesn't really matter.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      The question is about feeling weird around couples.

      I only take sides with minor things or jokingly. I don't exactly betray myself but I might force myself to be more agreeable with the woman. I feel the strange need to unite with my female counterparts. I want us to be more like bros and stand by each other like the bros do. If it gets too personal I stay out of it and I'm like woah you guys need to work on your differences and shit.

      Who of us is qualified to give advice? I'd like to hear what you have to say anyway.

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  • Spankz
    9 years ago

    I can relate a lot to this. Conversations with guys are much easier for me, because they seem to put more depth into what they want to talk about. They're the ones that will tell you all their favourite things in one go, whereas I find women (at this age) like to gossip and strike up shallow conversations. I find young women are irrational with their logic a lot of times. It might just be the hormones, or whatever.

    I've had one occasion where a guy in another relationship ends up liking me over his girlfriend and it isn't really a big deal. You might cause them to break-up, but all you have to do is establish to the boy/man that it simply will never be.

    The truth is, maybe you just aren't hanging out with the right couples. My boyfriend and I are masters at not making anyone feel like a third wheel. We interact with the people/person with us and always make sure that their comfort is first. We acknowledge the fact that coupley time (i.e. cuddling, kissing, arguments) is reserved for when we are alone. Sometimes we will kiss in public, but never to the extent that I have seen other couples. I mean, who wants to sit there awkwardly while a couple macks on each other? Not me and I bet none of my friends do either, so I find doing that is kind of rude. I don't care how in love you are, your make out sessions can hold out for a few hours.

    My advice to you? Avoid couples, unless they are ones that respect the "no third wheel" rule. Otherwise they will continue to argue in front of you and the like. A good way to tell if the couple is a strong one, look for a sense of humour in the woman. If that isn't there then the man will probably upset her at some point with one of this jokes thus provoking a long winded argument. If the woman has a strong sense of humour, the couple will most likely not make you feel as awkward.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      This is true. There are some couples I feel weirder around than others and it usually depends on the security of the woman in the couple. The couple I felt the most strange around was a lesbian pair who PDAed everywhere they went and would even touch on each other around children, as if the rest of the world didn't exist to them. We would be talking and the next moment they were making out and fondling one another. Yuck. I don't mind seeing a little affection, I think it's cute in moderation, but some take it so far that only a creep would feel comfortable around them.

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  • pipi
    9 years ago

    I can relate to it. I feel awkward too every time I hang out with my friends who bring their girlfriends/boyfriends. I'm the only one who is single.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    Honestly, I can relate.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Wanna be my brosis?

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  • Arm0se
    9 years ago

    I always feel left out somehow.

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