Is it normal to be upset that gf cancelled plans to go out with mean friend?

71% Normal
14 Comments

Today me and my girlfriend were supposed to go out somewhere. Early on in the day one of her friends asked to hang out, so she decided to cancel the plans we had. What makes this worse is that my girlfriend got mad at me for simply talking to her, citing that the friend is cruel (she is) to her and didn't want me to become friends with someone who is pretty much abusive towards her. Yet it makes this whole situation worse because she dropped our plans for someone who is horrible to her - and that my girlfriend has gotten mad at me for simply talking to as a result of that abuse.

Is it normal to be upset that my girlfriend cancelled our plans (albeit plans that were made the day before and it wasn't anything romantic, just more like hanging out) in favor of hanging out with a friend who she doesn't seem to like (she has explicitly told me that this person isn't her friend)?

Edit: I will not leave her. We've been together for a long while and our relationship is truly great. I couldn't imagine leaving her.

Voting Results
71% Normal
Based on 34 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 14 )
  • Steve2!
    8 years ago

    How tragic for you.

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  • Tealights
    8 years ago

    End the relationship.

    Not because she cancelled plans, but because she's putting her abusive friend above you and defending her terrible behavior. Sadly, your girlfriend is caught in that cycle, and she needs to convince herself that this girl is a bad friend; until then, you're looking at months or years of this until she snaps out of it or you break up and find a more stable girlfriend.

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  • Myghoul2099
    8 years ago

    citing*

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  • (s)aint
    8 years ago

    Thing is, you don´t cancel plans. If she had made plans with her friends first she stick to that. If the plans are made with you, she sticks to that.
    Only exception would be something like her best friend really needing her.

    Do you really think it sounds like she values you if she would rather hang out with this girl than you?

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  • Lifeistooshorttotakeseriously
    8 years ago

    Of course you wouldn't leave her over this nonsense! It's normal you're upset (but there's no reason your should be.) The good news is your girl respects you enough to tell you her honest feelings about the 'mean friend'. There are aspects to 'mean friend's' personality that she doesn't like BUT don't think for one minute that means she will actually cease being friends with her. (Women view friendships differently to men. Never fight her battles with other women. Women are competitive by nature. It's a part of our reproductive behaviour). You feel like she has cancelled plans with you to hangout with someone she should dislike. Not the case. As far as your gf thinks you guys had nothing special planned so she'll catch up with her friend and see you later. Want things to change next time? Make plans to do something. Just hanging is okay for guys but women get bored by it. Women have a lot of weird and wonderful rules - they make perfect sense to us but to guys it must be like running a field of land mines

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    • Ellenna
      8 years ago

      It would be wonderful if you could just speak for yourself and not all women! That's not a bad post you wrote BUT "women are competitive by nature" and men are not? Women get bored by hanging out? Not necessarily and surely some men do?

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      • Myghoul2099
        8 years ago

        i hate when you talk shit so politely.

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        • Ellenna
          8 years ago

          You think I care?

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      • Lifeistooshorttotakeseriously
        8 years ago

        My point proven. Did I say men are not competitive? Point in fact I did not. Your own warped sense of self is irrelevant here - this is someone else's question not about your problems and issues. Just maybe you could show how truly unique and interesting you are by writing your own, independent post? What you think is wonderful doesn't concern me in the slightest. Jog on!

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        • Ellenna
          8 years ago

          Y aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa wn

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          • Lifeistooshorttotakeseriously
            8 years ago

            Good to see your meds kicked in.

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            • Ellenna
              8 years ago

              What meds would they be?

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  • samspam
    8 years ago

    You don't want to leave her, but trust me on this - you have to show some balls or it's gonna be over soon anyway.

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  • RoseIsabella
    8 years ago

    Bitches be triflin.

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