Is it normal to be in love with a dead murderer?

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19 Comments

I'm an 18 year old girl, and I'm really obsessed with Robert Hawkins, the guy who shot up a mall in Omaha in 2007. I think I love him, and I know that probably sounds crazy, but I don't see myself having a relationship with any other guy. I feel disloyal when I get close to other guys, and when a guy starts getting too close to me or shows interest in me, I block him. I spend a lot of time researching him. I used to draw a lot, and now whenever I try to draw, I just end up drawing him. (I attached one of these drawings.) I get sad a lot over him, even though he has been dead for several years, and I did not know him personally. I probably won't change my ways because I don't want to, but is this normal?

Voting Results
15% Normal
Based on 34 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 19 )
  • dirtybirdy
    7 years ago

    Completely pointless and idiotic.

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    • Kindbred
      7 years ago

      Well yeah, but that doesn't very well help, does it?

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      • dirtybirdy
        7 years ago

        He's dead. He was a bad dude. You're obsessed and it's just a waste of time. What is the point??? You need to get over it and move on with your life.

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        • Kindbred
          7 years ago

          There is no more point to it than anything else, and frankly, I don't want to move on with my life.

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          • RoseIsabella
            7 years ago

            That's sad, and quite pathetic.

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            • Kindbred
              7 years ago

              I don't think it's any more pathetic than frequenting a website whose sole purpose is judging other people.

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  • RoseIsabella
    7 years ago

    He looks like a stupid, little cockroach of boy! It doesn't sound like love at all to me, but rather just infatuation and obsession. Go find something better to do with your time! I also don't think you're 18, kid. Not only is that little turd dead, but he's probably rotting in Hell!

    Honestly, I prefer that blond 40 something comedian by the same name as far as looks are concerned, but I don't know if he's actually funny or not.

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    • Kindbred
      7 years ago

      Maybe I don't come off as an adult because you have some preconception of what one should be that does not include possessing a seemingly irrational obsession, but I'd rather not be called "kid." I do not believe love and obsession are necessarily exclusive. I have used the word "love" because I believe it is appropriate to my situation. I openly admit to having an obsession, but not an infatuation. I hope you find comfort in believing that those to whom you feel morally superior will continue to suffer, as you seem to believe is deserved.

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  • Fenrirr
    7 years ago

    you must be pretty fucked up to love a murderer who slaughtered innocent people. go see a doctor.

    also laughing at you trying to defend yourself from the negative comments, what did you think was going to happen? everyone blindly accepting your love for a retarded cunt of a serial killer?

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  • Curious-trans
    7 years ago

    I havnt the fogiest who that guy is

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  • Tealights
    7 years ago

    You're just a fan girl.

    We're all fans of something, and what you're obsess with is crazy, but no different. Just preoccupy yourself with other things. Leave your house more often, maybe jogging or something. Eventually, you'll grow out of it if you allow yourself to.

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    • RoseIsabella
      7 years ago

      What is there to love about a shithead who goes on a shooting spree?

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      • Tealights
        7 years ago

        I don't know.

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  • Pamelap
    7 years ago

    Umm I was kind of obsessed over a serial killer mysterious and charming "looks". That was years ago and I know it was wrong on many levels.
    But I'll give you the most idiotic advice ever.
    Obsess over someone who looks like him and is alive. This way you can stop that infatuation with such a monster. And find a nice guy that kind of has his looks.

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    • Kindbred
      7 years ago

      To be honest, I did meet a guy that looked like him and all I could do was compare them. Unfortunately, I like him for who he was as opposed to his looks. Finding someone who looks like him would not feel genuine, and I would then constantly be aware of the differences between them, hence why I did not go after the guy I know who looks like him.

      Let me guess... Ted Bundy? Jeffrey Dahmer? Richard Ramirez? Those are the common ones I know at least, haha. This probably won't make you feel better coming from me, but I don't think that's terrible at all. :)

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  • lemon
    7 years ago

    It might not be normal to others but I can relate a lot. In 1999 I couldn't help but have a major crush on Eric Harris. It definitely became an obsession, my laptop was filled with anything even remotely related to him. I even wanted to listen to KMFDM and play Doom as I know he liked that. 17 years later, I'm not obsessed with him but I still think that him and Dylan had so much potential and wish they were still alive (along with all their victims, of course). I think you'll always have a soft spot for Robert Hawkins. Most people can't see past the crimes people have committed but I think I (and maybe you) can really relate to their pain, their anger, frustration, etc so we feel a connection to them. I think you're very likely to eventually have crushes on other people who have committed crimes, including rape. The word for it is hybristophilia or commonly known as 'bonnie and clyde syndrome'. It's also the condition that Myra Hindley had. But it doesn't mean you'll become anything like her. You can't help the way you feel, it won't go away even if you ignore it. I have a feeling though that you're not too distressed about your obsession and it doesn't necessarily mean anything bad. Don't worry and don't listen to people who don't understand.

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    • Kindbred
      7 years ago

      He's not the only criminal I've had a crush on, and I've considered that I might be a hybristophile. I actually did find Richard Ramirez, serial rapist and murderer, cute for awhile. You're right that my obsession does not distress me. It's more the fact that he is dead and the way he was treated before his death that upsets me. Thanks for the support. I don't take accusatory comments too hard.

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      • lemon
        7 years ago

        Yeah, I don't know about his case in particular but I was really upset at the way Jeffrey Dahmer was treated in prison and how he was murdered 3 years later. Even though I didn't have a crush on him.

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