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please don’t make fun of me because this is embarrassing but after i masturbate and i orgasm i get very depressed to the point where i feel lonely and i begin to cry.. i also have very deep thoughts about my life and overall existence. I was wondering if anybody else feels this way after they masturbate and if this is a normal thing, should i talk to someone about this?
i am a female.
First, you're not unique in feeling this. The Roman physician Galen wrote about it, so it's clearly something that's a pretty normal human experience.
The cause could be some deep, hidden sexual trauma that you'd need to spend years in therapy sorting out, or it could simply be due to all the complicated neurochemical stuff that goes on in your brain during orgasm and immediately after.
More detailed discussions here:
https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/post-coital-dysphoria-miserable-after-sex-sad-relationships-love-a7526501.html
https://www.vice.com/en_uk/article/qbemkx/why-do-some-of-us-feel-sad-after-an-orgasm
I'm not sure a lot of people are overjoyed after it. It's just maintenance. If you're not getting any or between relationships you do it so you don't go insane. And everyone does it. So who gives a shit. Enjoy it in the moment and get on with it afterwards
I think its post-coital tristesse (PCT) :
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/crying-after-sex
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-coital_tristesse