Is it normal to be a 30 y/o who has never had a g/f?

32 Comments

I'm a 30 year old guy with binge eating disorder, morbid obesity, generalized anxiety disorder, depression, diabetes, sleep apnea and male pattern baldness. I am an atheist, so finding a like minded individual is difficult. I have never had a girlfriend or sex. Is there any hope of finding love? Should I keep trying?

No, there's no hope, you need to stop trying	3
No, there's no hope, but keep trying.	2
Yes, there's hope, but stop trying, it'll come naturally	12
Yes, there's hope, but you have to keep trying.	13
I don't know	2
I don't care about another 30 year old virgin on IIN	0
I don't care about another atheist on IIN.	2
I don't care for other reasons.	3

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Comments ( 32 )

LuxM4G

8 years ago

It's certainly possible, it depends on how selective you are about women.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  I'm not very physically picky at all. There's some mental/emotional pickiness.
  
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  - LuxM4G
    
    8 years ago
    
    I cannot imagine what you must be going through. Have you ever tried being part of obesity support groups online or near you? You could find some interesting females. Tell us more about you and what have you tried to solve your clinical problem.
    While you could adapt to it psychologically, I'd advice you to fix it.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      8 years ago
      
      I see a psychologist, a psychiatrist, a dietician, an internist, an endocrinologist, and have tried to get gastric bypass surgery (denied until I can fix the binge eating permanently with the psychologist). I am trying to fix everything wrong with me, and I have for a long time. It's just not working. I've tried so much.
      
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      - LuxM4G
        
        8 years ago
        
        My name is David, what's yours? Which pharmaceuticals has the psychiatric prescribed you?
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        8 years ago
        
        I'm Matt. I have been on Sertraline, Fluoxetine and Lorazepam. The Sertraline has lost a bit of its usefulness recently, the fluoxetine gives me terrible stomach aches and the Lorazepam is only for extreme stress. I'm hoping to move onto different drugs ASAP.
        
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Barracuda

8 years ago

do you live at home still?

also, tell us about your encounter with women....? (if any?)

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Nope. I'm an MBA JD with a good job and my own place.
  My encounters with females have been awkward and very anxiety inducing. I have taken several girls out. I don't do the bar scene and never smoke or use drugs.
  
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Aries

8 years ago

The health issues and personal barriers are definitely the reason behind all this . The closer you get to resolving these , the closer you will be to overcoming your fears and meeting people . If it hasn't been working out , maybe take some time to work on you solely and then try again . I think not only for a partner but for the good of your health my friend .

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Thanks. I'm giving a strong effort to do so.
  
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thegypsysailor

8 years ago

There are so many things you mentioned in your post that you could change to make yourself more attractive to women. Of course, it would take a great deal of hard work and will power, but if your priority is to get a girl friend (and have sex) and a more normal life, then what's a few years of hard work?
Your choice.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Much of this would change with weight loss. I'm aware. But you must know that this didn't all appear as a shock today. I have been fighting against these things for as long as I've known that I have them. I listed all the people I'm working with above to try and fix it. As soon as I can get the binge eating disorder licked with the psychologist, I can get on that road.
  
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green_boogers

8 years ago

It is time, my friend, for a blow job by a professional sex worker. I hear that the really good ones work in Pahrump, NV. But there are lots of lot lizards that will do you right in the drivers seat of your car at any truck stop. (I am told that they swallow too.)

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Haha, I would, but A) sex slavery B)STD C) I'm more hoping for a supportive relationship. D)That is very far away. :)
  
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  - green_boogers
    
    8 years ago
    
    You are already 30. You have spent 10 years looking. If women liked you, they would have interacted with you intimately by now. Don't waste any more of your life.
    
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(s)aint

8 years ago

You can not wait for others to help you, you have to try and help yourself.

Main problem is your binge eating? I say endure the anxiety and take walks while eating broccoli or if you don´t like leaving the house get indoor exercise- equipment.

Negative emotions is NOT the end of the world, it WONT kill you. It only gets as much power as you would let it.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  I am helping myself by seeing qualified professionals that have helped me more in a short time than I have been able to on my own. The advice you gave, while I'm sure well-intended, is not feasible as a long term solution for this problem.
  
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213

8 years ago

listen son, don't give up you still young and keep on hoping

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Thank you for the kind words. I hope to hope forever.
  
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RoseIsabella

8 years ago

Define morbidly obese.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  5'8" 275 lb.
  
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    8 years ago
    
    Well, do you ever go after women in your own league?
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      8 years ago
      
      I only go after those in my own league.
      
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      - RoseIsabella
        
        8 years ago
        
        Right on.
        :-)
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        8 years ago
        
        Thanks, but doing that still isn't helping. It's very hard to maintain any sort of relationship with generalized anxiety disorder.
        
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal to be a 30 y/o who has never had a g/f?