Is it normal to avoid a new serious relationship long after divorce?

81% Normal
1 Comment

My wife divorced me two years ago and married two months ago with her new man.
We where married nearly 20 years.
She was strong and smart.
She was my rock.
She has broken of ALL contact with our common friends and me.

I have stayd on in our houses.
My teenage kids spend 50%% with me.
Since the divorce my contact with them is wonderful.
I have à great time with my kids and all my friends.
I run a multinational business with I own and it is very succesful.
I gave my ex enough money to live well for 50 years or more.

People like me because I am kind, fun, write poetry type and understsnd others so well.
I am European and write on an iPhone and my spelling is strange.

I have admires from 18 to 90 years old.

Yet, I have a problem to fall in love and feel committed.
I tried already..

It seems I enjoy my current free life with friends and kids and art.

However I lack a woman to love and wake up next to.
But I do not want that ...
I want my freedom and feel love and realtionship is not a holy things.
I have seen so many divorces and sad people.
I am scared to let a woman into my house on a permanent basis.

I do meet wonderful women and when I or they start to get interested I tell them about my hesitation becasuse I want to br open upfront.

I already have kids...

I feel a bit sad about my current situation but I feel
I am on a mountain march to knowledge. On one side is the mountain and my friends and family. On the other side is the green valley . It is à narrow path and sadness snd happy moments. Great view !

I feel stuck however.

Is it normal not to comit and what can I do
about it?

:)

I Love life,

Voting Results
81% Normal
Based on 31 votes (25 yes)
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Comments ( 1 )
  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    Is it once bitten twice shy, or the more likely, just that you are quite ambivalent. Hey - its only been 2 months for goodness sake. If you are dating and just want to be at that level - say so.

    Almost anyone could understand why you don't want to plunge deep into another relationship weeks after a 20 year marriage crumbled - that would be weird.

    I am sure you can wake up to a person next to you w/o being in too deep. Go with what feels comfortable, experiment a bit, take your time & cut yourself some slack.

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