Is it normal that the guy that claims to be attracted to me doesn't txt me?

60% Normal

A few weeks ago I met this lovely guy and I had my very first kiss with him (I'm a girl btw). He was drunk and was saying lovely things to me like: "your beautiful, I'm really attracted to you, you are really attractive". He didn't say them all in one go but he did say them alot. He also asked if i would date him if I lived closer and I said maybe. I told him that I'm not looking for a relationship. The next day he was leaving and he hardly spoke to me, though he is really shy when not drunk. Also when we kissed he was rather aggressive with the kiss, don't know if that's a sign of something...I have been the one texting him and now have stopped as he doesn't txt me first, so did he really mean the things he said or what? please help

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60% Normal

Based on 35 votes (21 yes)

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Comments ( 41 )

NeuroNeptunian

11 years ago

Uhh...
You told him you don't want a relationship. If he's got any sense he won't pursue you.

He was drunk.

Being interested and attracted to someone doesn't mean you'll pursue them, especially if they've shut you down.

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- MilleBornes
  
  11 years ago
  
  Agreed
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  why is everyone jumping to the conclusion that I want him to pursue me!!!??? O.o I never said that, did I! I just though it would be nice if he contact me first since he is the one that said he would still like to, geez.
  
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  - NeuroNeptunian
    
    11 years ago
    
    I would like to ask you a similar question. At which point did I say that you wanted him to pursue you? I would like a direct quote, please. If you can't provide one then drop your claim.
    
    He's interested in you as a love interest. He's not interested in being in the friend zone. He's not going to waste his time on someone who will not come around to him. He wants a relationship not just friends. I don't know how else to explain it. If you can't understand it then I can't help you. He's looking for a girlfriend, not a girl friend. In the time he'd be wasting on you, he could be spending it on a girl that is interested.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      you implied it twice Quote: "You told him you don't want a relationship. If he's got any sense he won't pursue you. and quote: "Being interested and attracted to someone doesn't mean you'll pursue them," so there!! I know he is looking for a RELATIONSHIP but he also said that he would still like to keep in contact, he also said that he wouldn't mind if I got a bf one day and that any guy would be lucky to have me. You can share love with friends by the way! Not just a relationship.
      
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      - NeuroNeptunian
        
        11 years ago
        
        Oh, so I didn't actually say it, you just imagined that I implied it. No wonder he didn't keep in contact with you. If you spoke to him the way you're speaking to me, he probably assumed that you're bananas. He WAS drunk after all. One would have to be to see this nonsense as attractive. Did he actually say he'd keep in contact or did he "imply" it? I'm starting to doubt your story.
        
        He dumped you off and didn't want to hurt your feelings. He wants to share love in a relationship, not in a friendship with a girl who obviously lacks the cognitive ability to understand this. No decently functioning adult would waste his time with this poppycock. Leave it alone.
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        I imagined nothing! gosh, that's what you implied and that's what you basically said just not in a direct manner. You are now just ranting on about "imply" because you know that I caught you out, just admit that I am right then we can stop going backwards and forwards. Why would I speak to him the same way I'm talking to you? You can't even compare my conversation that I had with him with yours as you are being very childish. I know what he said and he was direct with everything nice he was saying, I am not going to bother explaining any further as you obviously are trying to alter my story to make it suit your credulous belief of me implying something that is in fact true! and poppycock? what's that mean, and I'm am not in the cognitive stage in this situation, I am with driving however.
        
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    11 years ago
    
    #thought
    
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    - dodongos
      
      11 years ago
      
      *thought
      
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      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        you didn't answer my q?
        
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Stifler

11 years ago

Dear~Random Lady

Are you bad at spelling or am I just imagining all those grammar fails?

AAAAAAANY WAAAAAYS! He was drunk...and you never gave him your number...he probably looks at your texts and thinks "who the fuck is this person texting me?" or somthing like that. Besides... it's just a stupid text. no big flipping deal. I for one don't text people unless I am texted.

Yours truly~Lee Xu

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  yeah I am actually bad at grammar as no one teaches me :/ What are my errors by the way?? I did give him MY NUMBER!! He txt me when he was walking me to my cabin just so I could get his number, then I txt him straight back WHILE we were walking.
  
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davesumba

11 years ago

lol, typical girl to be making all kinds of stuff up in your head to worry about.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  haha yeah
  
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DavidS.

11 years ago

if i tell someone they are really hot but (as we are kissing) but they tell me they dont want a relationship then i get the hint and move on...hes normal, youre not...if you want him to contact you and have sex then, guess what, thats a relationship

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  no shit! I know what a fuking relationship is, and by the way! a relationship doesn't always involve sex! Also I never said that I wanted sex with him, a simple txt would be nice, geez
  
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kingsleycrowne

11 years ago

well you told him you weren't looking for a relationship after the point where he asked if you would date him, so what's so strange about him not pursuing you? have I missed something?

He probably feels like if he gets involved with a girl he wants to date but who doesn't want to date him it will end in heartache. That's a perfectly reasonable line of thinking. Or maybe he's just not the type to initiate text conversations. I know me personally I hate sms, I prefer to call.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  you are spot on however, I am not expecting him to pursue me, he said that he respected my decision and that he would still like to keep contact and he also said that he wouldn't mind if I got a bf one day (which I found odd since he likes me so u would think that he would mind). Anyway the point is is that you would think he would txt every now and then to say hi...
  
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  - kingsleycrowne
    
    11 years ago
    
    sounds like a nice guy. there are not many guys out there that can put their own thoughts and feelings aside and graciously accept rejection like that. I would suspect though that he is telling you one thing while his heart is telling him another.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      he sure is, like I would give it a go...dating him u know but I have my reasons why that I'm not going to explain..thanks for your comment :) he really is amazing though, well he seems to be
      
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      - kingsleycrowne
        
        11 years ago
        
        yeah well if you are concerning yourself with him texting you it does highlight to me that there is a bit of interest there, maybe a small flame?
        It is hard for alot of men to keep platonic relationships. So even if you wish to just remain friends, depending on the guy that can be impractical, sadly.
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        Well I know that he would make a great friend so it would be nice to hear from him once in a blue moon. And he is the one that stated that he would still like to keep contact, perhaps that was a lie
        
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Terence_the_viking

11 years ago

ohohohoh. this is beautiful.

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MilleBornes

11 years ago

Also seems he has just gotten over a harsh relationship and his emotions are trying to get in order. I did exactly this. I didn't lie about the beautiful woman, in another situation I would've been the perfect man, as I was to my ex., I was hurt, confused, needy, and drunk at those times. I didn't drink because of the break up do I wasn't all depressed. being friendly and energetic is what I guess attracted those women to me.

Keep contact, as friends only, meaning don't get crazy over no calls or no text answers. You'll be ok. If you tend to fall for guys who tell you things when they're drunk, however maybe you should address that issue

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  what makes you say that? And how do u know? I do know as a fact that he has been fucked over by his exes. I need to say that I don't fall and he is the very first guy that has said anything ever so nice to me(he just happened to be drunk. So no!! I don't have issue mate , thanks a lot
  
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    11 years ago
    
    Also he is already a lovely guy when sober, just more open and able to speak his mind when drunk.
    
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    - MilleBornes
      
      11 years ago
      
      Ok.
      
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      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        ??
        
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        MilleBornes
        
        11 years ago
        
        oh, forgot about you. Doesn't matter how nice he is while drinking if he can't be that way sober then he's kinda useless.
        
        It seems that you're really desperate to be with someone. I'm sure that you can find someone to be just as nice in ANY situation if you hold out a little more. If you seriously think you need this man, try suggesting counseling I don't believe in it but most people do. This way he can get over his ex and move forward with you without needing drugs to be nice.
        
        Seriously, do you want to come home from a long day of working with retards who make you feel like shit, to someone who won't support you because he hasn't taken a drink yet?
        
        And, I still say that he used your weaknesses to get you in bed. Obviously, your weakness is a goodlooking man who just talks nicely
        
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      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        11 years ago
        
        you didn't answer my first question as I am curious to know the answer? Also what's with the ok? I hate it when people say that as I don't get what it means ...
        
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LizardSkin

11 years ago

Excuse me but why do you care? If you're not interested in him pursuing you and you don't want a relationship why the heck does it matter if he texts you?

Either you're not being truthful about your story or you're cuckoo for cocoa puffs.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  I don't care, I am just curious why he wouldn't when he said it was perfectly fine if we remand friends and that he is the one that asked for MY ph number.
  
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  - LizardSkin
    
    11 years ago
    
    I don't know, maybe he was just trying to be polite.
    
    I know that the girls who think this whole "guy friends" is a legit thing should wake up. It rarely is. 95% of the time the guy is just looking to hook up or get laid and waiting for his chance to pounce. Looks like this guy didn't want to wait or didn't think he had a chance.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      true, however he also said the he is celibate...
      
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mas0n342

11 years ago

holy shit, calm the fuck down you blond little tit face. guys dont stare at there phones unless there watching porn. just chill.

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- Stifler
  
  11 years ago
  
  Some how I agree.
  
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  - mas0n342
    
    11 years ago
    
    i know right.
    
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    - Stifler
      
      11 years ago
      
      Although I hate porn I find my self always looking at a side boob or some shit like that on my phone. DAMN YOU POP UP ADS THAT ADVERTISE DEODORANT THAT DOESNT MAKE WOMAN RUB AGAINSY YA BODEH!
      
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal that the guy that claims to be attracted to me doesn't txt me?