Is it normal that my mom doesn't want me at home at 19

21% Normal
8 Comments

I'm 19. I live at home. Basically i got good grades in high school, played sports, everyone thought i was going to college. But my dad didn't really care about me. My moms an alcoholic and she chose alcohol over keeping up with the bills.

At 16 i had no lights, no hot water to shower, and pretty much no clothes or spending money. I decided to drop out of school to get a job.

Had my ups and downs. Saved enough money to help my mom get her lights back on. Moved out for around a year. Started getting my hours cut so i moved back in. Right now i'm just trying to lay low and focus on internet marketing so i can save up enough cash to live comfortably.

But my mom treats me like i'm the biggest bum ever. Every other week she'll just freak out on me and tell me how slow I am because i'm 19 and still stay at home. And the worst part is even though she hounds me about moving out and being slow? She also expects me to pay her rent.

And i would have no problem paying her rent if it was reasonable. But no. She wants to take my money for rent and then not pay bills, not buy food, not do anything but get drunk, and then ask me for more money? This month i ended up having to pay half the rent, the light, and internet bill. As well as buying food for the past two weeks. All the while shes getting drunk and telling me i'm a failure.

She makes me feel like i'm the dumb one. But my girlfriend tells me my moms in the wrong and parents are supposed to be more supportive. Idk. What do you think.

Voting Results
21% Normal
Based on 29 votes (6 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Alberthall
    9 years ago

    Not all parents are what they should be. Sometimes the child becomes the parent and visa versa. You can get sucked into a whirlpool of your mothers making or you can swim for the shore. It's up to you. Put yourself first or your mother. If you do the latter you will get sucked into her whirlpool and drown, but you can swim to the shore and save yourself. The trouble is if you swim for it and fail, you haven't got your mother or anyone else to blame for your failure.

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  • deepthought33
    9 years ago

    She has no one else to scapegoat but you. She is throwing her personal shame at you, but it obviously isn't enough pain for her to change or she would have tried already.

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  • Parky_Parker
    9 years ago

    Your mother is selfish. My parents allowed me to live at home past 20 because they wanted me to be successful in college. I was only able to work part time, so paying rent was out of the question.

    I've seen many parents kick their kids out at 18 just because the kid is technically an "adult." It's understandable if your kid is a lazy motherfucker who doesn't have any goals, but otherwise, I don't get it.

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  • green_boogers
    9 years ago

    Take up home brewing. Cheap alcohol for her. Meanwhile you secretly save up money to move away where the cost of living is really cheap.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    Your girlfriend is right, and your mother is all kinds of wrong. It might sound heartless, but if I were you I would move out and let your mother suffer the consequences of her alcoholic behavior.

    On a large scale in society your mother's behavior is completely abnormal, but for an alcoholic or drug addicted parent it's sadly quite normal to neglect and abuse children.

    Check out this website:
    <a href="http://www.adultchildren.org/" rel="nofollow">http://www.adultchildren.org/</a>

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  • britionn
    9 years ago

    Parents always make you feel that you are dumb. My father has been doing that to me since I was born.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    does she rent , have a mortgage or own outright?

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  • TareBear20
    9 years ago

    With my Mom it was sending the money I gave her to her boyfriends jail canteen. No Bueno. Sadly enough it is starting to look like these are becoming the norms of society.

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