Is it normal that my friends are getting mature, but i am getting stuck?

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7 Comments

When I was young I took pride on my maturity. While my high school friends went to parties or got high, I was already working and trying to get my life together. I also studied a lot, in hopes to get a scholarship... which thankfully, I did get. I remember being very ambitious back then... I truly wanted my life to be going somewhere.

I guess that my first mistake was not choosing my major wisely. I dwellt into the social sciences, while also taking many art courses. I was the first one to graduate from college among all my friends... but in philosophy. Later I took more classes and eventually graduated as a journalist as well, which wasn't very wise either.

I got my first job related to my career quite fast... but because of the economy, I was laid off. I haven't been working since then. I moved in with my parents again and I am slowly wasting all my money. I am just 25, but I feel like I wasted my life. Now I am searching for some menial job to at least be able to have a decent life. I feel so stupid about being so carefree when choosing my career.

But what disturbs me the most is how easily things turn around. I basically can't hang out with most of my friends anymore, because they all have responsibilities. Many are getting married, while others are getting important jobs. One by one, those former immature friends are becoming lawyers, doctors, managers, etc. Meanwhile, I just stay home all day playing videogames or watching animes or movies. It is so sad.

I was just wondering if anyone ever experienced something like this... so... is this normal?

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74% Normal
Based on 47 votes (35 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • lisac1919
    10 years ago

    While I did not experience what you did when I was younger, I do feel your pain about the whole 'all my other friends are maturing and getting on with life except me' thing.

    My story is kind of the opposite of yours, but it landed me in the same place. In the beginning of high school, after meeting the people that would become lifelong friends, I suddenly had to move to a different country. I went to a really shitty school where I had no friends and I hated. All I could think about was all the partying and fun things my friends were doing back at home and how much I missed them. Well then my parents decided to move back and send me back to the same school where my friends were. Turns out, while I was gone for that year hoping I could see them again, they changed. They started caring more about school and preparing for college than going out. That combined with the fact that the school held me back a year, to a class where people bullied me, I became very resentful to them; to the point where I hated going to school and didn't care about grades. I didn't even apply to university.

    And so I had to take a gap year (a year with no school), in a new country again mind you, where I had no friends, and did nothing but watch tv. With, believe it or not, ANOTHER move, and a 21st birthday, I am now embarrassingly JUST starting college at the only one that would accept my bad grades, and have no idea what I want to study and have no friends yet again. During holiday I do nothing, tv and computer. Meanwhile my friends from high school have already been in college for 3 years, are getting into serious relationships, finding jobs, traveling, meeting people, partying, having adventures, discovering their talents and one even went to Africa all by herself and slept in a goddamn tent to help kids there learn English for christs sake!

    I just feel like i'm so behind in life compared to people my age but I guess its just my circumstances. And slowly I am learning to just accept it and get on with life like I was supposed to during the time when I just felt sorry for myself. But I still do feel the pain of feeling like im wasting my life or that im a failure. Use that as motivation, that's what I do.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      I don't think you are that immature, you just had it harder than your friends. Since you were moving all the time, I guess that you couldn't fulfill many phases of your teenage years. Just think that many people start college at 21. Let me tell you, it makes no difference to end college at 22 or 26, you will feel the same. I ended it too early, but now I feel like it just ended yesterday.

      Even though our stories are different, I do relate a lot with you. I hope that you can get ahead in life.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    "There's no such thing as maturity, only the illusion of a comparative emotional and a intellectual structure amongst humans. It is just another subtle control device, to control those who would threaten the balance of society. It is another way to bully people into conformity through the use of their own logic against them."

    -Tommy, king of all cats.

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    • MissDethstar
      10 years ago

      I totally agree with you,Tommy, king of all cats.

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      • [Old Memory]
        10 years ago

        "You'd better agree with me, or I shall smite you and roll your corpse in my feces."

        -Tommy, king of all cats.

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        • RoseIsabella
          10 years ago

          Meow meow meow!

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          • [Old Memory]
            10 years ago

            Meoooooooow!!!!!!!!!!

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