Is it normal that i've never had a boyfriend?

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12 Comments

Sorry, I guess this topic has been here quite often, but anyway... I just turned 21 and I have never ever had a boyfriend or even something close to it. Already in school guys didn't really talk to me and nobody ever asked me out. Since I moved to another country, I constantly get attention, like guys stare at me wherever I go, I get complements on the street and I have been approached on the street by many guys/men, but I never have interest in them. The guys I spend my time with never seem to be more interested than just friends, or at least they never show it (maybe I can't read some signs) and all the guys at school staring at me never approach me or try to talk to me. Recently a friend of mine (ex-classmate) told me that many guys in our class liked me, but they were too scared/intimidated to ever talk to me. I may look a bit unapproachable on the street, but strangely that's where I get approached most.. normally I try to look kinda friendly. If a nice guy im interested in talked to me or asked me out, i would be more than happy to go.
Not a long time ago, met some cute guys on the street and we went out, but thats were it ended, they didnt even ask a number or anything, they were from a different city, but come on... then i thought maybe theres something wrong with me...
Oh and also got my first kiss only this year, pretty late, but at least.
A bit about me: I am definitely not a depressed girl with no confidence, I am shy though, but confident, I think I am pretty enough for lot of guys to like me, clever and at least my friends think I am really funny and fun to be around. I have tons of interests, I like sports, Im active, in good shape, still i have lots of free time that i could spend with someone. So I don't really get where's the problem. I am too shy to approach a guy myself, but please, girls get approached by cute guys every day, just asking why it coudnt be me someday?
sorry this turned out pretty long, just need a little space to express my sadness.. :D
Any ideas/tips???

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75% Normal
Based on 56 votes (42 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • alv1592
    12 years ago

    It's ok, I'm 19 and still single. I haven't even kissed a boy yet. My cousin didn't have a bf until college. Not everything has to happen before you're a certain age.

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  • 1Swagger2
    12 years ago

    i envy you.

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  • FocoUS
    12 years ago

    late bloomer? Did it take awhile for men to be attractive? No worries join the club.

    Fix your nerves. The shyness will hurt. I'm the same way. My last and only two boyfriends initiated the relationship. (And they kinda sucked) I never start a relationship, not cause i'm prude, because I'm shy too. It's bad but I'm learning how to flirt.

    Once me and some friends went to lunch together. The bartender was eying me but i didn't know how to flirt. It took 4 friends to get me the courage to give him my number. That's pretty bad. Ladies like us just need to relax a little.

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  • MrsEdGein
    12 years ago

    I'm 38 and have never had a boyfriend and don't ask is it because I'm gay because I'm not. Men just don't find me attractive. I don't blame them cause I wouldn't want to be seen in public with me either. The constant single life is killing me.

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    • dzhii
      12 years ago

      and if you really think it is only because of your appearance that you don't have a boyfriend, maybe you should do something about it; like you said that even you wouldn't want to be seen in public with yourself. these are things you can change/improve ;)

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    • dzhii
      12 years ago

      how do you know that men don't find you attractive? I personally think it shouldn't all be about the looks, though everybody is attracted to that at first. I have seen a LOT of couples, where I am thinking how did these two find each other?, but apparently they're attracted to other things.
      and i seriously mean it - it is NOT about somebodys attractiveness, because well, i am not trying to be arrogant or anything, but i think i have the looks, i have been complemented on them, but still i don't have a boyfriend, never had one and not a single time a guy has shown me strong interest on wanting to get to know me better or be my boyfriend. sometimes i think that guys just want a girl who jums right on them and they don't even have to move their little finger, don't know if that's true though, but there are girls like that, that are so easy to get.

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  • psm45
    12 years ago

    I just turned 21 and NEVER had a girlfriend. I have an approaching problem and also get nervous when it comes to being affectionate. So you're not alone on both sides. Sometimes I ponder why I don't or haven't I been in relationship and it's gets me down so I try not focus on it too much. I know I have something somebody wants!

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    • dzhii
      12 years ago

      maybe its silly, but i have always been awaiting from a guy to make the first move and as they don't, I am starting to think that maybe I should do it, but i definitely don't have courage. Many of my friends think that i look too unapproachable, like guys are scared to talk to me, because they think i'll dismiss them or be mean to them. but i personally don't think that i look that way, i am very kind and unless the guy's too obtrude, i won't be mean.
      i guess its also right not to concentrate on it too much.
      I hope you'll find someone soon! ^^

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  • peaches902
    12 years ago

    I'm the same way 21 and never had a boyfriend. Well a real one that is. It's hard to be single at 21 because it's embarrassing to tell others that you've never had a boyfriend because they give you all kinds of crazy looks. But 21 is still young, so there's plenty of time ahead of us. And I agree with alv1592, everything doesn't happen at a certain age. Everyone is different. And everybody falls in love at different ages. When you meet the right person, you'll be happy you waited for him.

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    • dzhii
      12 years ago

      yeah, i totally know it.. all this: why don't you have a boyfriend and stuff. and they give me these weird looks when i tell i have never had one. but i guess you're right, that things come when the time is right. just been waiting for so long and starting to think that i'll probably never find someone and will spend my whole life alone...

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  • squeallikeasacofpigs
    12 years ago

    I'll be your boyfriend. I'll smile when I see you, tell you how beautiful I think you look, hold you at night when there a thunderstom outside, cuddle on the sofa with you, be there to catch you whenever you fall. But most of all, what I'll always be there to do, is to give you amazing....oral.

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    • dzhii
      12 years ago

      well that's a bit too much at a time, but...emm..thank you, it was really helpful :D

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