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If I could get away with it and conceal it, I might do it. I really can't stand her nonsense anymore. She controls me, constantly calls me useless and always badmouths me (most are untrue) to relatives and neighbours making me ashamed to face them. She keeps harming me so how do I stop myself from killing her?
I will not deny that I have had a moment in my life where I wanted to kill someone too. I had whole method, blue print, everything. But I kept reminding myself that if I do it, the likeliness of me getting away with it is slim. I didn't (and I do not now) want to spend the rest of my life in prison. I don't think it's normal, but I think that a lot of people have wanted to kill someone at some point in their lives.
Just remember, if you do it, you're risking the rest of your life.
I would always repeat to myself afterwards "If I get caught, my life is over. I won't give you my life." The only thing that held me back.
Cut her out of your life. You can't change her, only how you react to her. Why are you ashamed of her badmouthing you when she's the one acting crazy, you are only responsible for your self.
There's a foolproof way to get away with her murder.
1, Kill your mother (any method will do).
2, Kill everyone else in the world.
That just leaves you and animals, and animals aren't known for their judicial system.
I would leave her and start a life of my own if I were you...But killing someone is bad...
I cant even count how many times i've wanted to kill my own mother this week alone. Most of those times, it was just something stupid like she had the audacity to ask me to stop playing my VERY important video game to take out the trash, HOW DARE HER! But in all seriousness, we all have those thoughts, just don't act on them. Your mother feeds and clothes you and for that alone, the least you could do is let her live... :)
You're probably a fifteen year old brat who was asked to take out the trash.