Is it normal that i think of myself so highly?

7 Comments

So.... Lately, I've been having these, um, strange and dark thoughts.

I realize this might sound really bad, but I've thought about what would happen if I'm ever left alone, you know, by everyone that I cherish, and...um... the first thing that I thought of was killing myself. I've thought about it, and figured that the way I would do it was overdose.

However, the more I thought about it, and the more I realized that I'm not the problem. There's nothing wrong with me, in fact, I'm pretty much one of the greatest people ever. Self-centered as that is, I can't help, but to agree.

I never do anything wrong. Sure, I do make some tiny errors, but who doesn't?
However, compared to other people, and what they've done, I'm pretty much a saint. I'm wondeful. I'm kind, friendly, I don't judge others (unless they really deserve it, which sometimes they do) and most of all, I hardly ask for anything in return. All I want is your friendship, and if we are friends, I'll try to be the best friend ever. I'll never argue with you, and if you make me mad, I'll hide it to avoid any fights, because I can't risk any friendship to end over something pitiful.

So, in conclusion, killing myself would be pointless because it wouldn't fix the problem. Like I stated before, I'm not in the wrong here, it's other people who are. I'm easy to forgive people, but one thing I won't forgive is if you leave me. Forget about me, or worse yet, choose me over someone else.

That's one way to make me hate you, and I don't use the term "hate" willy-nilly.
If I say I hate you, I mean it, and I'll never forgive you, ever.

Is this normal?

Yeah, it's normal. 3
I'm like that too. 3
No, you're self-centered. 2
Sounds like a mental disorder. 4
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Comments ( 7 )
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    I thought this was completely normal up until the end where you said you would hate someone if they choose someone else over you.
    That kind of jealousy is very unhealthy.

    As far as the rest, I think it is normal for people to feel that their problems are caused by others and not themselves. I will say I often feel this way and I realize it is something I cannot usually admit because people see that as being egotistical and narcissistic.
    However I don't think I am narcissistic because I do not require other people to feel good about myself.
    I think I simply notice the flaws in humanity and notice how I am effected by those flaws. Yeah, I screw up too, but I can fix my own screw ups. I cannot fix everyone else's screw ups which is something we just have to except or it will drive you nuts.

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  • thegypsysailor
    9 years ago

    You sound, in clinical psychological terminology, like a real nut job, and should probably spend some time in the loony bin.

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  • WhiteStallion
    9 years ago

    You sound like a push over. Try being less socially compliant and maybe you'll stop having suicidal thoughts when you're alone. Just let it out girl...tell people what you really think!

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    You very much are the problem if what you explain is legitimate...Just sayin'.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      I understand.

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  • reminiscent
    9 years ago

    Ok ummm...first... its ok to have a healthy opinion of yourself. I think im nice, I think overall im a good person, a great mother and artist.

    However...I think you are way self centered as you put it. Like I grew more uncomfortable as I read your whole post here. and i dont think your thoughts are good or healthy.

    I am unsure on what makes everyone wrong...like what are they doing?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Yes, I see how what I said might of been a bit disturbing, and I admit, I might of wrote this post when I was a bit upset, so perhaps my emotions clouded my rational thinking for a bit.

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