Is it normal that i'm having difficulty forgetting and forgiving him.....

61% Normal
6 Comments

Until a week ago I thought I was blessed with the boyfriend I have..in the past two years we have struggled a lot trying to get by we were having difficulty finding jobs and so on but we made it somehow ..since we don't go out much since we haven't been financially stable...the few times we went out these past two years they haven't really been good times he's not the best drunk and last week I pushed myself to go out for his friends birthday because I just started this job and I worked a 12 hour shift that day and he wanted me to go out with him for his friends bday ..to make a long story short he got drunk and we got into an argument and hes usually not the nasty aggressive type but that night we got into an argument and he screamed at me in front of his friends and strangers in front of this club and he was just so aggressive he treated me like I'm his enemy ..i was so humiliated and felt horrible I've never gone thru something like that...this is my concern when we don't argue he's great and sweet but when we fight he's a whole different person a scary one and I feel like he's getting worse as time goes he does and says things that I would never imagine ..ever since our argument I don't see him the same and I treat him so coldly and I can't help it when I see him I see that monster I saw that night ..I don't know what to do..

Voting Results
61% Normal
Based on 28 votes (17 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • ygrowup
    12 years ago

    Don't walk, but run away from this type of relationship, usually just gets worse with time. Let him know why! Good luck with your choices!

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Yeah it's normal, I've been the same way to my girlfriend, even been violent. I completely regret it and I don't drink anymore, we still have arguments of course but they never get as bad as they did. We got over it so can you but it would probably only work if like me he quit drinking, I never use to be violent on drink either then all of a sudden I was, the last time I was drunk i smashed my own house up. Been sober for 3 months next week though and got my life back on track. So things might seem bad but if he's willing to put the work in then you can get over it. If I can be forgiven for multiple cock ups then I'm sure you can forgive him for one.

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  • PumpkinKate
    12 years ago

    If the pattern of radically different (and violent) behavior continues when drunk... get out of there. I would say leave now, because it seems from your post that your gut is telling you something... it's VERY HARD to leave someone you love, but you also have instincts for a reason.

    I was in a relationship with someone that would get quite volatile when we argued, but was the sweetest person ever otherwise. I chose to stay with them, and they eventually ended up hitting me pretty bad one time. One time, and I left. That being said, it's not a guarantee the same thing will happen to you... but be careful, and be strong if you feel you need to leave.

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  • :)BABYDOLL:)
    12 years ago

    I been with my BF for 5 years now and our relationship has alot of ups and downs we been threw it all. There was a time when I also thought I was lucky to have him because he would never hit me no matter how mad he got. Hes sweet and funny when were not fighting too and he changes into a different person when we do fight just like your BF.I honestly think that FOR ME the only thing that keeps me from leaving him is because we got 4 kids together and hes a great dad and our kids love him!!!! If I didnt have his kids I would have left him a long time ago :)

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  • emilydoll
    12 years ago

    You need to talk to him about it and see how he reacts. If he acts defensive that could be an issue as he might not see his wrongs and perhaps bring up something you might've done to him as well and apologize. You shouldn't be afraid to have a serious conversation about it.

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  • squeallikeasacofpigs
    12 years ago

    Just stay away from him when's hes had a drink. What a weirdo anyway, I get all touchy feeling when I'd had a drink, If you were my girlfriend the most I would do to you infront of my friends is kiss yo face! A LOT

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