Is it normal that i i'd prefer to be raped again than ever have a colposcopy again?

11% Normal
14 Comments

I had my first colpo on Saturday. Although the health practitioners had an amazing bedside manner and I got lucky because I took on a cancellation, I found it extremely difficult and painful to the point I'd rather be raped again (This, sadly, has happened more than once).

At least everyone knows that rape is meant to be bad, whereas a colpo is meant to be for the good of your health.

Then again, I find myself thinking about how someone could well need a colpo after being raped.

I've not spoken to anyone about this and am honestly not sure who to tell about this if anyone.

I'm not counting CNC or any kink play because those who practice CNC &/or adjacent kinks do hopefully involve consent; and those can be a way for those who've been raped/assaulted to process that sometimes.

Voting Results
11% Normal
Based on 9 votes (1 yes)
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Comments ( 14 )
  • [Old Memory]
    2 years ago

    Damn, i misread it as "colonoscopy".

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      Don't worry, you're not the only one. Even I've made typos to colonoscopy. They're such similar words and in a vaguely similar area of the body which helps nobody!

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  • charli.m
    2 years ago

    This sounds so awful. I'm sorry you went through this.

    It sounds like you have trauma from your past rapes that's affecting you when you have this medical procedure. That's not at all surprising, given the nature of the procedure. Were your doctors aware of your history? Have you had any counselling?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      No idea how aware doctors are. No point, they'll just gently ask about counselling and make vague soothing noises. That's always been the case when I've brought it up with healthcare professionals in the past.

      Have had counselling but not to do with rape.

      Some of what I've had has helped, some hasn't. Doesn't help that I'm non-binary and on top of all this I'm thinking about Sarah Everard, my feelings for IWD and what I call "women's culture", had it done two days before my period, am not convinced it's not cancerous or at least being played down and apparently had a "mild" infection at the time.

      I honestly don't believe my past rapes are the biggest factor here at all.

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      • charli.m
        2 years ago

        That does sound like a huge amount of shit going on for you right now, compounding everything. I honestly cannot imagine how overwhelming it must be.

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  • RoseIsabella
    2 years ago

    I've had a few colonoscopies, but they knocked me out for the procedure.

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    • LloydAsher
      2 years ago

      I misread colposcopy too. Glad to see I'm not the only one

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  • LloydAsher
    2 years ago

    I can imagine it sucks but a colonoscopy is just one of those things an adult has to do at some point so you dont let cancer slip by undetected.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      Colposcopy, though *not* what you said.

      And I don't think you have any idea how badly it can such for some.

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      • LloydAsher
        2 years ago

        Ah sorry, dyslexia.

        Yeah that must absolutely suck.

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    2 years ago

    And of course I'd only realise at 11PM GMT that there was a session online that would potentially have been brilliant for this... The next one's not for another week or two, fuck it!

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  • litelander8
    2 years ago

    The fucking duck clamps are the worst. My gyno has to constantly remind me to breathe. 🙄

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      Do you mean the speculum?

      Usually I don't mind that but for some reason this one HURT LIKE FUCK. Apparently I had a "mild" infection, high risk HPV but low something else.
      My last smear (last month) was also really painful and I don't usually find they are.

      I do know I ended up missing my smear for several months, maybe a year, because of The Current Situation and/or when I'd bleed.

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  • idkyourmom27
    2 years ago

    WHAT DA FOCK IS RONG WIT U HOMie?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??

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