Is it normal that i have multiple internal monologues and streams of thought?
So I know for sure I have one normal internal monologue. It describes what I'm doing, and whatever I consciously decide to think about.
Then there's one that tries to bring me down. It used to be just "sit on your ass all day, dont get up" kind of thing. Over the years it ahs gotten good at manipulating and reasoning with me to do things. Procrastination is its most common offense, it'll create some bullshit reason to make me not do anything. It is what keeps me from working out. It always says I can't do it, I should just stop now.
Then there's a more anxious one. A lot of the time, it materializes as an impending feeling of doom. There have been weeks in a row where this has kept there, and weeks where it hasn't. It always says oh fuck you gotta do this, or something. Whenever I'm deciding on a course of action, I like to look at all of the outcomes. This voice always fixates me on the worst one(s), and either this one or the prior one tries to get me to not do anything out of fear. This fear is almost always about social situations.
There's one that just reflects, probably the most powerful one. It'll just pick something random I've done and reflect the hell out of it. It can get annoying really quickly. It'll constantly make connections, draw trends, etc.
There's also one thats always saying what I should do, some sense of 'nobility'
Also an angry one
Also one has given quite a few thoughts about dying, I've struggled a lot with these thoughts
There could be more I' forgetting, probably not.
They used to be more distinct, but the negative ones especially have tried to sound more similar to the others. This sound btw is like talking, with different tones of voice.
The longer I have been alone (online interaction doesn't do shit mostly), the more and the more distinct they are. It feels like they are all at varying levels of consciousness. I hate the bad one, but it has very good manipulating skills, and I frequently get pulled down by it.
What is this, what can I do?