Is it normal that i have a poor body image?

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I am a cutter. I don't want to hear things like "you shouldn't cut because it's detrimental to your health." I just don't really like how my body looks and I'm just not happy with myself. I'm not overweight but I'm not skinny either, and sometimes I feel really bad about that. Is it normal to feel a lack of self-confidence all the time? I have never not been insecure. Does this make me weird or something? I just don't know what to do about this to allow myself to actually like who I am and like how I look.

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55% Normal

Based on 33 votes (18 yes)

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Comments ( 10 )

CountessDouche

7 years ago

Think back. Do your remember those moments you had as a kid where you just felt comfortable in your own skin? Where you could go swimming and laugh and not second guess yourself for even a moment. Those times where you didn't bother looking in the mirror?

That's the goal. Forgetting yourself for a moment. Unfortunately your sense of self worth has gotten irreparably tangled with your perception of your physical appearance. It's hard to undo that damage.

I'd recommend doing something that you're really proud of. Something that makes you feel like an awesome person. Do you like animals? Go volunteer at an animal shelter. Work with the homeless. Create a cool piece of artwork or sing in the shower. Do a cross country bike ride or join a swim team. Do something that makes you forget about the way look, only if it's temporary. Be kind to other people. Doing something good will keep you from focusing on your looks, if only for a moment. When you feel at your best, you will feel beautiful, and it'll show.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  I don't remember any of those moments. I had a terrible childhood and I was always alone and I was never able to have very much fun. I don't think there is anything that I'm good at that could make me feel better about myself.
  
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- TRUMPTRAIN
  
  7 years ago
  
  Sounds like you are projecting about yourself here...
  
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mysistersshadow

7 years ago

I'm really sorry your suffering through this I have done other kinds of self-harm but never cut so I kinda know what its like. Can you describe what you would change to like your body better that might help.

1 think I heard once for cutters is to put a rubber band around your arm and snap it when you want to cut it hurts a little and shouldn't leave any permanent marks or scars.

I don't think it means your weird or anything like that there is alot of pressure put on girls in our culture and its easy to feel like you don't measure up. Are there other things going on besides body image stuff?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  I would like to be thinner. I know I can't do anything at all about my skin color but it sucks being discriminated against for being any other color than white. I wish my skin wasn't so messed up, from being dry. I don't like how my face looks although some people say I'm "hot" or "very beautiful" some people think I'm ugly and I just don't like my face. I think my face is crooked so I feel like I look better in pictures...only the ones that I take myself. I wish my hair were longer and that my eyes were wider and I want fuller eye lashes. Yeah, my friend told me about the rubberbands and also squeezing ice cubes but I still feel that pull to cut. I'm just suffering from severe depression and suicidal thoughts. Today I really didn't want to keep living but I heard some songs that someone sent me (The Call by Matt Kennon and How Can You Get That Lonely by Blain Larsen) helped me change my mind. I am not confident at all but maybe I'm just too scared to end it all.
  
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  - mysistersshadow
    
    7 years ago
    
    Thinner is pretty easy tho it may take a while you just eat less and hopefully more healthy foods and exercise more. The problem with losing weight is that it might take a year or more to get where you want to be and thats like watching the hour hand on a clock it just doesn't seem to change.
    
    I don't know how I can give any advice about not being white cos I've always been white but not everyone will treat you bad becos your not white. For every ethnicity there are ppl that think that 1 is the most beautiful. How bad is the dry skin problem? Like moisturizers don't help? If so then maybe see about going to a dermatologist to find out what can be done.
    
    Without seeing your face its hard to offer any suggestions but I wouldn't put up a face pic on this website.
    
    Hair grows just takes time. There are makeup tricks you can do to make your eyes look wider or bigger. Actually you can do alot with makeup if you try you can probly Google up lots of things to try.
    
    Are you taking any meds for depression or seeing a doctor or councilor about it? If not that may help alot. If you are then maybe you need to try to open up more about the issues your having.
    
    If your having thoughts of seriously hurting yourself and you don't have anyone to talk to please call a local suicide help line they can be really helpful. I'm speaking from experience on that one ok? We need you to stay alive you are important and if you don't believe that then just take my word for it I said so!
    
    And you didn't say if there was anything beside body image stuff is there anything else thats driving your depression?
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      7 years ago
      
      Sometimes its hard to believe that anything good will happen. Sometimes all I want is suicide. I don't have a phone so a suicide help line won't be possible. Family life is bad. It's hard to explain, I'm not being physically abused or anything but it just feels really empty here. There's no "real love". I don't have any friends so that's hard bc I'm always bored and I find that it's easier to make internet friends. I know that's not healthy and could potentially be dangerous. I don't have much going for me right now. I don't want to fail school bc I get to graduate early next year. Homework is making me so stressed because I'm just not good at any of these classes and I have no idea wtf I'm going to do once I graduate. I'm not inspired to be or do anything. Sometimes I feel like I'd be better off not having a life at all. I suck.
      
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      - mysistersshadow
        
        7 years ago
        
        All I can say is don't give up you never know when things might turn around.
        
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thegypsysailor

7 years ago

You need to achieve, accomplish or succeed at something. Let's say you want to buff out. Set a realistic goal by finding a picture of what you'd like your body to look like. Join a gym, a tanning parlor, find a place to run, ride a bike or swim and work your ass off.
Then set another goal, and work toward that one.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  7 years ago
  
  Perhaps that could be helpful somehow.
  
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Is it normal that i have a poor body image?