Is it normal that i hate my husband's job so much

76% Normal
8 Comments

My husband has worked for this farmer since 2013. The hours are long-especially from August to November. The pay is not the greatest-in 2014 he only made $16,000 working for this guy. Three of my sons are home full time (my oldest is away at college for most of the year) and two of those three sons are autistic. Because of my sons' autism, everything and anything they need or have to go somewhere for is left up to me. Because of their autism, people are afraid to babysit for me if I want to go somewhere without them. I have Crohn's Disease, so the stress that those hours cause are the last thing that I need. He refuses to find other work because 'he likes working there'. I feel like he doesn't really give a shit how I feel, and I have built up a lot of resentment towards my husband because of all this. Is it normal that I have such a problem with this and want him to find a different job? Or am I just being ungrateful and selfish?

Voting Results
76% Normal
Based on 25 votes (19 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Picklejuiceandpussy
    7 years ago

    You work, he watches the kids. Problem solved!!!

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  • mokuton
    8 years ago

    Respect farmers....

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    • craftymom24
      8 years ago

      Did I say anywhere in my post that I had no respect for farmers? No. I am saying that a farm job-its hours, its pay-is not a good fit for OUR family life, and that my husband refuses to see that.

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  • RoseIsabella
    8 years ago

    Give those boys a couple of pot Brownies, that should quiet them down.

    I think your husband could certainly stand to be a much better provider. He sounds rather selfish to me. Are your boys on medication of any kind that might help them? I know I must sound awful to some people, but what you're describing sounds like my worst nightmare. I'm not saying that to be mean and I'm sure some people might judge me, but I'm grateful I don't have autistic kids to take care of despite the fact that I have much respect for the way people with autism or Asperger's are so incredibly honest and straightforward. There are people with these disorders that I really like and respect, but I've attended events about music as therapy where the children made me feel glad to be childless.

    I wish you all the best and hope that your husband gets up an opportunity to earn more money so he can better provide for you and your children!

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  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    No offense, but what other job that pays significantly more, would a farm hand be qualified for?
    Also, if your husband was working at something he hated or was stressful, chances are he would get sick, which certainly wouldn't help your situation.
    Are there no government programs in your area to help you with the boys? Perhaps there is a social service day care program they could go to for a few hours, a couple of days a week, just to give you a break?
    I don't see you as being ungrateful or selfish, just at your wit's end, and in need of some help.

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    • craftymom24
      8 years ago

      It's not like he has no other capabilities. He has a bachelor's degree in forest management, is a volunteer fire fighter, and is an EMT-Intermediate Tech(which means he can administer IV's) for our volunteer ambulance service.

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      • thegypsysailor
        8 years ago

        Well, then I guess it comes down to him doing what he likes, or taking a job he doesn't and bite the bullet to take care of business, to give you what you need.

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  • Aries
    8 years ago

    I can appreciate him wanting to work somewhere he likes however 16 thousand dollars for a years income is just not sufficient to provide / contribute to the family needs . I think he should strongly consider finding new work that pays out better .. something that will make living easier for everyone . I think loving work is all fine and dandy but it has to pay a livable wage too..

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