Iin: that i give advice to the girl i love on how to get another girl
Alright, yes. I fell in love with someone over the internet. I've known her for over half a year and we've gotten really close, her name is Cathrine but I and everyone else calls her Cat. We've talked via webcam so I know she's not some kind of creeper, so please don't lecture me about that. Anyway, I love her, more than I should. She's told me from almost day one that she's madly in love with her best friend, who doesn't know she loves her.
I recently confessed to this girl, and this is how the conversation went (by the way, we were chatting on IM and the words between stars are what our actions would be):
Me:
Okay... *takes a deep breath and looks away*
I kinda sorta have a crush on you. Please don't be mad!
Cat:
*blink* Seriously? you're not screwing around?
Me:
Y-Yeah, I'm serious. *hides*
Cat:
...You REALLY thought I'd be mad about something like that? *pokes* You can be a little strange sometimes.
I...I'm not sure if I return the feeling..COMPLETELY, I care for you a great deal and all...a-and maybe I think I feel..something along those lines for you as well but...agh, I'm no good at this...uhm...Look, it's not...COMPLETELY unrequited...and such....It's hard to explain...///
Me:
*blinks when she's poked and and blushes a bit* Yeah, I know I can be. *grins* I'm weird.
It's fine. *looks away again* I knew that wou wouldn't, but I'm happy that I was at least able to tell you. *blushes again* Hard to explain...?
Cat:
*grins back* No kidding, Eh? I'm not mad though.
I'm glad you told me too, I really can't stand not knowing stuff like this~ *blush* *nod nod* I've just been thinking lately but..Ignore me~ I'm crazy haha~
~~~
Alright, ending the chat thing.
Anyway, my confession went way better than I expected. I would have told her over the phone or on webcam, but I was shy and unsure of her reaction, seeing as she's already in love. I feel a lot better now that she knows my feelings, and just being her best friend is more than enough to make me happy. But, still... My heart hurts. Cat still tends to talk about her crush, and I acutally give her /advice/ on how to get closer and maybe together with her crush. Am I stupid for doing that? As long as she's happy, I'm happy, even if that means that I can't be with her. I value her happiness more anyway.
Even though I try to crush the feelings, I still can't help but hurt a lot when I think about it or when she brings up her crush on another girl.
To sum it all up, am I an idiot for helping her win the other girl's heart? Am I a bad person for not liking the rival girl? And... How can I stop my heart from hurting so much?