Is it normal that i feel awkward around my dad because he used to yell at me?

Is it normal that I feel awkward around my dad now because he used to yell at me as a child? He still does sometimes, I am a 19 year old female in college now. I still live with my parents, they are not divorced, and we are a christian family but my dad has always struggled with his mouth. I have always been a good kid. I have never sneaked around or went to parties or done anything disrespectful towards either of my parents, except for small things when I was little such as talking back. Which all children do at some point. There has never been a time when I can remember my dad not being stressed out.

Money has always been an issue, and he decided to take up full time truck driving so he could pay everything off. He really is a good hard-working man. He is not home a lot of the time, he has been doing this for 12 years. But he has yelled at me over the smallest things for as long as I can remember. I have never been able to stand up to him to tell him what he is accusing me of is irrational because I am afraid of him yelling louder and saying more hurtful things.

This has majorly affected my ability to relate with him and have normal conversations with him. I hate when I have to go somewhere alone with him, he tries to talk to me about certain things and I almsot dont know how to talk to him. I am constantly afraid that whatever I say to him he is going to get mad and start yelling. I don't call him when he is on the road (and he usually is for about a week at a time) because I just don't know what to say to him to keep a conversation going. I feel like he doesnt know me, because I have always been afraid to just talk to him. And that causes ANOTHER problem because here I am, 19 years old and in college, and he still treats me as if I don't know a clue about how to handle everyday situations. He will lecture me about the safety of being in public without him or my mom being around, when I am an adult and have been driving since I was 16... going places, including work. I know how to handle myself. But just to give you an example, there were times when my car messed up (a car he gave to me to use), and I obviously didn't have the money to pay it so he said he would when it was going to cost about $500, that I called up my boyfriend to ask the name of the man he always went to to get his car fixed (this man was really cheap and did a quality job on everything). I got my boyfriend to call my dad up and personally recommend this man because he knew more about him than I did. My dad took it completely wrong and got extremely angry at the both of us "for insulting his intelligence" because he knew there were cheaper ways to go about fixing my car, but he didnt want to take advantage of them. Which is the dumbest thing I had ever heard.... my dad got angry and yelled at me accusing my boyfriend and I of trying to be cocky and order him around, when we were only trying to help. This is just one of many things. I don't feel like I can offer him help for anything, because he will take it the wrong way, as if I am trying to insult his ability. Which I'm not. Everytime I think I'm making progress at improving our relationship I'm not. And it is so frustrating. I am not an easy cryer, but I have been so conditioned to him yelling at me from such a young age that anytime he starts to raise his voice I start crying. Then he yells at me more because I am crying, which makes no sense.

Someone please help, I don't know what to do. It makes me want to move out of my house. I hate the fact that I dread it any time he is home. I want to be excited to see him, but I'm not. Whenever he comes home all I can think about is what he is going to be angry about this time. And there are occassional good times. But mostly they aren't. It is not just me who is damaged from his wrath, my brother who is 8 years older than me (and just moved out of the house about 2 years ago) suffers from extreme social anxiety. It's almost painful to watch him try to interact with other people, he just doesn't know how to talk to people he doesn't know. I am the same way but I am not as bad as he is. He has dealt with this issue 8 years longer than I have, and of course it was probably worse for him, him being the first child. We have talked about dad before and how we don't understand what's wrongwith him. But I need someone to please help. Thank you