Is it normal that i don't want to be in a relationship (ever?) / get married

72% Normal
9 Comments

I, as a 26 year old female, want nothing to do with an intimate relationship with neither men or women. I'm not a lesbian, but I often get asked this by some of the more rude people I encounter, who know too much about my life. I don't want an intimate relationship, let alone marriage. The strangest part of it is, I like living with other people (my roommate) but we work out together well, we talk, share expenses, get along well and she is female (just platonic) and I like it like this, I want it to stay like this but I'm afraid she'll move on one day and I'll be alone.

Is this normal?

Voting Results
72% Normal
Based on 39 votes (28 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    It is not normal to not want anything intimate and it's entirely possible that you have not met the right person, but I'm not going to speculate much.

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    • Anime7
      11 years ago

      I second what Neuro said.

      I met a girl with the same mentality as well, not interested in people; but eventually she met someone who she actually enjoyed the company of. It's possible that maybe you just haven't met anyone different.

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  • Mando
    11 years ago

    Its not so difficult to understand that some people don't want the entanglements and obligations of marriage. Few have no ambivalence that way even when in a happy and successful union. And there are always some who happily chose the life of bachelorette/bachelor.

    I find it interesting how much you enjoy companionship with your roomy and do not wish to be alone. I think this is an aspect of marriage/couples that is deeply underplayed.

    Beyond the sex, mores and biological imperatives - and improved living standards - the institution of marriage also offers, for most if cultivated, a lifetime of companionship and a deep emotional bond most crave.

    There is nothing wrong with being single. But it also involves no risk and takes no effort.

    It does take effort to find someone who would be a good match for you - which presumably includes a limited desire for intimacy (sex). But there is much more to marriage/coupling than that.

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    • Santa'sUlcer
      11 years ago

      I see what you mean. I agree that marriage offers a lifetime of companionship and love, but like you said it takes time and effort to find someone who you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with, maybe even a lifetime. Unfortunately, it seems like a futile endeavor for most, and they resort to second choices just out of the fear that if they don't marry then, they'll be alone forever and of course it leads to high divorce rates because they learn they're with the wrong person.

      For me, it's incredibly difficult to find a person who I can remotely identify with. Most guys I meet understandably want the same old life of eventually settling down, getting married, having kids, etc. Things I'm not interested in doing, now or ever. I guess you could say I've given up the search for a guy I can identify and be in a relationship with.

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      • Mando
        11 years ago

        Santa'sUlcer? HAHAHA ... that's great!

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  • Corleone
    11 years ago

    Have you ever had a relationship?

    I get that you don't want one of those boring relationships where people sit around the house all day listening to each other murping about the same two or three subjects they're interested in.

    But not all relationships are destined to turn out like that. Don't you want anyone to give you some affection?

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    • Santa'sUlcer
      11 years ago

      You know, I'm actually not a very affectionate person. I could go without all of that for the rest of my life with no problems. I've been in relationships before, but I have never been very happy with them. I guess that doesn't rule out the possibility of being happy with one, but the chances... too low? Even then, as I said I'm not touchy-feely/affectionate and I think that other people want that in a relationship.

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      • Corleone
        11 years ago

        Depends what you call touchy-feely. There are definitely people out there who feel the same way as you do, though the touchy-feely types are in the majority.

        If you've had some unhappy relationships, then it's completely normal that you don't want one right now. Just enjoy being single. There are no rules to how you should live your life. If this is what you want, you should do it, regardless what people think of it. :)

        Hell, I have periods when I don't want to have a relationship as well. So go on and enjoy yourself :D

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  • Thewomanizer
    11 years ago

    hmm im 18 and beginning to think that im gonna be alone foreverr cause i just dont want relationship and fuk marriage lol

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