Is it normal that i don't know what i'm doing anymore?

53% Normal
2 Comments

Being alone terrifies me. The thought of knowing that I'll probably die without anyone giving a shit about me if I keep doing this.
I want people to be there for me, I really do. And I do have a few who care. But every time they try to talk or want to hang out I just shut them out.
It's like I'm a different person sometimes.
Like right now, I'm fine.
But sometimes it's like I don't know why I'm doing what I am. And I always regret it.
Like leaving my old school, blocking my best friend, not talking to my brother.
I don't blame them for not caring.
And sometimes, or maybe a lot of times, I just cry and my head hurts and I can't stop it.
It's like there's an alarm clock going off somewhere in the background at all times but you can't find it to switch it off.
When I'm fine like I am right now I go out there and talk to people and it's great. But something just snaps and I don't want any of it anymore and isolate myself.
I'm pretty certain that this isn't normal but I honestly don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I don't want to tell my dad. He's's already dealing with a lot of shit and my mom's a bitch (that's a different story all together).
Is there anything I can do to make this better?

Voting Results
53% Normal
Based on 15 votes (8 yes)
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Comments ( 2 )
  • AbnormallyAwesome
    7 years ago

    To me it sounds like you could suffer from some imbalance like depression or bipolar disorder - I'm no doctor though, so don't take my word for it. Either way it couldn't hurt to talk to a therapist if that's possible.
    The situation with your parents seems to be difficult so that might have something to do with it aswell. I get that you don't want to talk to them about it, but you NEED to talk to someone - Maybe a close friend. Sometimes just talking about it already helps.
    I also felt kinda lost, alone and desperate a few years back. Here's some things that helped me, can't hurt to try:

    1. Keep busy. Don't spend too much time in your own head overthinking things. Find something you like doing and work on it, set goals and try to improve yourself. So next time you want to lie around and feel sad, you can just do this instead.

    2. Say "yes" a lot. When someone asks you to hang out, go to a party, make a trip or whatever - If you have no other plans say "Yes.". Even if you think it'll be awful and you're too lazy to go. Fuck it. Go spend time with people.

    3. Be who you want to be. Sound obvious, I know. But if you sometimes feel like "Why do I have to be like this, why can't I be more like .......", that's often just a decition you can make right there. I bet there's a whole bunch of things you'd like to do and nothing is there to stop you. If it's not hurting anyone else, just go for it. Right now you could decide to do some course and aquire a skill you've always wanted.

    4. Go outside. Yeah, quite simple. Whenever I feel kinda numb and empty I take a walk outside, even when it's night - Especially when it's night. Helps to free your head and get things into perspective. Also it's good for your health and you get to know your naighbourhood.

    5. Be grateful. Whenever you find yourself thinking about all the shit that's going wrong, take a moment to think about all the things that are great. Starting with the fact that you're alive. Do you have food? That's pretty great. Do you have extra money? Wow, you could do so many things with that. Do you have people who love you? Holy sh*t, dude, that's pretty amazing.

    Sorry for the long text and I wish you all the best and hope you feel better soon.

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  • AlcoholMixedWithValerian
    7 years ago

    I used to be alone too, but then i found Allah

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