Is it normal that i caught my boyfriend masterbating while in bed with me sleep

Oh dear! First off, let me just say that I hate it when people let religion come between them and their partners and destroy something that was good. Why stop having sex just because you're going to church? Sex is natural and part of our driving force, religion is a destroyer of all man's instincts. If you were having sex with him before, why stop now? Do you really think it makes a difference? Are you atoning for the sin of enjoying intamicy with somebody you love?

As for what he's doing, I don't think it's wrong, or abnormal and I don't think you should be mad at him. Men and women alike masturbate and even when in happy and healthy sexual relationships. If you don't and don't understand it, then you have issues with sex. That is pretty sad because you will never have a happy and fulfilling relationship as long as you have issues with these things. If I caught my husband doing that in bed next to me, I'd be so turned on by it and would just take the initiative and help him out. What could be sexier? You need to just relax, and let go a little and stop being all hung up about things that come naturally to people. I think you're the one with the problem, sorry to say that, and I don't mean to put you down, insult you or make you feel bad. I just think you need to re-evalute your feelings and try to find out why this bothers you so much. The guy is not cheating on you!

If your not going to have sex with him what do you expect him to do?

You unilaterally cheat him out of a sex life, then you have the nerve to ridicule him for this, then you ask if you should be angry implying YOU are the one who was wronged?!? You sure are a manipulative piece of work. My advice would be for your boyfriend to dump you and find someone who respects him. I feel so for the man whose life you make a misery.

i think he should be pissed

Hahaha Ok ReaperAJ all i really wanted to know was that i was making a mountains out of mole hills...which according to you I am. So thank you and yes i can chill out now (so no offense taken at all). and no i dont have a problem with him masturbating...i used to do it and i completely understand it. I was really wondering should I be pissed that I was right there in bed with him...usually he does that on his own time, which is fine by me I'm currently not giving him sex.

Also, when i say i started going back to church...im catholic...so going back to church means I have follow the rules :/ and premarital sex is one of those big "no nos" Its a catholic thing...you really cant make up the rules. blah blah blah. I think you understand what I mean. Also trust me this sucks for me too...I LOVE sex and not having it blows.

Anywho again thank you ReaperAJ for your comment and I'll chill now.

used to love doing it to one semi recent pretty significant ex. she worked nights, and i mostly did it as id come take a nap with her, when I got off work. She caught me a few times, sometimes w good results, others were pissed, saying hurry up. until i got hooked nutting on her lowerback/panties/butt.. SHE WAS PISSED. GROSSED OUT..and OFFENDED. I couldnt relate. Where a hot girl in my bed often wanting get off on my unconcious body, than, perhaps smear a little dna on me in both thanks and achievement.. anyways. had to become a carefully planned hidden thing for me, and i hope that she someday reads this and knows "hey, nutted on your butt an easy hundred times while you were out"

he was probley just about to have a wet dream.

get married then!!!!! you cant have sex with your partner for years or how ever long then decide one day i'm going to church again so no sex till we're married, i'd be wanking in that situation, be thank full he's wanking by you and not doing what some other men would do by going elswhere for sex.

If you are cutting him off then you have no right being pissed at him.

Now if you gave it to him any time and he still felt the need to get off while you slept THEN be pissed.

But yeah you turned into a god freak so no reason to be pissed.

Nah, you shouldn't be mad. This man is a saint for respecting your sudden decision to completely cut off all sexual activity.

If it's any consolation to you, I will confess that there have been times I've done it in bed while my husband slept soundly. The reason? I was horny and he was not in the mood. The hope? That he caught me in the act and got in the mood. I was extremely turned on by him being next to me, his body touching mine and not being able to have him. I most certainly did not disrespect him at all and I guess fantasy aside, I would have probably died of embarrassment if he did catch me. Still a roll in the hay would have tempered the embarrassment I reckon. Anyway, yeah, you're stressing over a small thing. I think this happens more often than we realise while we're asleep. We're but human and sometimes the need for release outweighs the need for circumspection. Glad you feel better about it. :)

Dude...chill....

Hey nothing to worry about at all! I've been busted doing this twice. lol once was before we went to a wedding. I was really horny and wanted to do it before the wedding but she didn't think we had time so she went to take a shower...While she was in there i stayed in the room locked the door and thought i could crank it before she was done...as soon as i was orgasming she knocked on the door lol the most embarassing thing ever. she was pissed and didn't give me any for the rest of the day

anyway needless to say, for it wasn't a big deal at all. it was simple. i was horny and knew i wasn't going to get anything so i had to relieve myself. During this session i was thinking about her. If anything she should be flattered she makes me so horny :)

btw, help ur bf out. throw him a hand job at least! it's torture to be next to ur gf in bed and just sleep if u haven't released for the day

Its only happened this one time and hes not that type of person who fantasizes about getting caught in the act. Trust me Ive asked about stuff that he likes and turn ons and such. But the next morning I actually forgot about it (i guess i just "slept it off") and then he apologized and I was like what did you do? And then i was reminded about it and i was oh yea.... (and got re-bothered by it) we talked about it kind of when he and I was like what made you? and he was like i dont know i was horny (haha obviously) and i was like ok and just let it be and i forgave him. But even though i was like ok whatever it was still ever present in my mind and then it began to snow ball...so i just need to get some perspective and just realize that i was being crazy, hence me writing this entry haha. So now that I know I'm being crazy I can calm down. And I wont be bothered if it happens again...I guess ill take the initiative next time and go to confession later haha. But again thank you for your input.

Look, while I understand that it's easy to have issues about this sort of thing, honestly, I don't think it's disrespectful. Disrespecting you would be him forcing himself on you, or forcing you to commit acts that distress you. Maybe he has a fantasy of you catching him and things going further. Have you spoken to him at all about this? If you open up and just ask him why he does it, the answer might surprise you. If you really can't come to terms with it, then stop sleeping in bed with him, or stop having sleepovers. I don't know what else to suggest, other than a good heart to heart about the issue.

your presence probably arouses him

Masturbation is fine, it does not bother me what so ever that he does, again like you said what else is he going to do. But the question is while I'm in bed with him though? Also, we don't live together, so its not like he doesnt have his own time or his own bed. We don't have sleepovers all the time either. So you still think that's fine not disrespectful at all?

You are being ridiculous.
Seriously, NOT normal.

this happened to me last niht-woke up to find my boyfriend masturbating! i was soo pissed but still thought i'd help him out-he then went flat on me!!!! I have been in a right state today! i feel so let down!! his excuse for going flat was he said he couldnt feel much cos we have been doing it more than usual lately, yet he managed to maintain an erection while wanking???? im fuming