Is it normal that i can't find anything to distract me from my relationship?

Ya that's what afraid of when his work gets going since he might move somewhere else and he already knows people there so its like he's gonna have a new life and feel stressed about having me far from him. He was already in a LDR before me and didn't work out cause of the distance so I guess he gave it a try again and I'm afraid its going to end too. But ya you're right its either one of those and it's prob going to have to be me to move closer. I never thought id be one of those girls to move for their bf but I really do love him and he's special so I guess that's what it takes. Ending it wasn't an option unless something definite happened like I did find out he cheated and I had the evidence or something else so breaking up just cause I think it might not work out without knowing for sure kind of bothers me.

Yeah I mean I guess the reason why he hasn't cut it off is cause I havent bothered him that much about not having time for me. If I did, he would for sure figure its best to go our separate ways. But since I don't, he thinks I'm okay with it and well, yeah I rather be like this distant from the man I really wanna be with than be with someone just cause I get to spend time with them almost every day. But it does get stressful. I def don't think I'll get a sec chance with him if I ended it cause 1) he's busy and 2) I dont think I'd have the guts to chase him. But if he were to come back to me, like he has in the past, well I'd prob take him back.

I know I do have to work on being unavailable for him. He always comes out of no where to visit me and its fun but every time hes come, I'm always available like he doesn't have to ask if he can cause he thinks Ill always be there for him. I guess next time he does tell me hes ccoming out of no where and I am available, I'll have to pretend like I'm not home lol it'll be awkward but I have to show him I'm not always free to see him even though I am and want to be.

Well thank you for listening.
I do feel.like calling him and just bring all of this up casually but still express my feelings. I've tried to cover them up in the past cause I don't wanna cause a commotion but in the end, it doesn't solve anything. So I wanna be serious this time but not like attack him. Plus he's really busy so I don't wanna be that annoying Gf who won't leave her bf do his thing. I just have to be really strong and remind myself how much I love him when I'm frustrated so I don't get out of control and risk losing him cause there's really deep moments where I'm almost ready to break up w him for whatever reason like the distance when were doing fine and I'll prob be really unhappy if I make that move.

The thing is though is yes if he can try his best to accommodate me and my feelings and reciprocate what I give him, everything will be extremely fine. But if he's too busy to put me on his priority list as much as he wants to, then that's where it doesn't help my situation. Yes he doesn't have time for me but he wants to so what do I do there? Wait?

Yeah he is pretty busy to express himself or have time for a relationship. That's the thing is he wants me but he doesn't want the responsibility of a relationship. Sure he enjoys being in one when things are going right but when I bring up I'm unhappy with something that's what he doesn't have time for. There's when he realizes he doesn't want a relationship. So I've tried to leave it alone and things have gone smoothly but I can't help it when my feelings get hurt . I'm not just gonna let it slide or else I'm letting him get away w things he thinks is okay to do and they're not so if I don't bring it up then how are we gonna grow? Also we have been together for a little more than a year so I feel like its too early to make a move like me move there or him here. But it does feel like its been a few years cause of all the stress. Also good things dont come fast or easy so I look at this as were building a foundation to have a long-term relationship. If I tell him I'm unhappy w the distance he's gonna be like I knew it and I knew it was a bad idea for us to be together. So I don't want to bring it up exactly but at least let him know that he can try a little more to make me happy since we're long distance. I really do just want a job but one that I like so I can worry less. But idk I see people who are really busy and when they're with heir partner they out a lot of effort and make it special.I don't feel like i get that from him but again, is it cause of the distance? But wouldn't the distance make it even more special cause we don't see each other as often? Sighhhh

Ya I think I've done a good job the last few months by not caring so much and just having faith. Things have been going more smoothly cause of that until he does something that hurts me. He doesn't do it on purpose but its just his lack of interest and effort that bothers me. So basically I feel like he has his own life going on away from me and he doesn't even like include me in it or I feel left out. So I got upset over that and made me think of the distance. Like I said the best thing to do is find a distraction if I wanna keep going and not willing to move closer to him but the thing is I can't find anything. I'm literally not interested

Eh I like working out but I do that all the time. I was trying to see if I join some type of fitness group but it's not for me right now. I don't have that many friends. I usually make guy friends and I'm done w that cause thy just get disappointed when I say I have a bf and I'm back to not having friends. Honestly my hobby right now consist of finding a stable job so all I've been doing is sitting in front of a lap top.