Is it normal that i am unsure about this guy?

67% Normal
12 Comments

So there's this guy at my job... I normally prefer women, but I have felt some level of attraction to him ever since he arrived earlier this year. One day we were talking very sexually (I was feeling flirtatious), so I gave him my number and told him that I wanted to try straight sex with him for the first time since I was very attracted to him and he seemed like a cool guy. He seemed very eager about it. The problem is, he's in the middle of getting a divorce/separation from his wife, and my other female coworkers are constantly flirting with him! This one girl is constantly hugging him even though she already has a boyfriend. And he doesn't seem to mind all the female attention. I'm extremely jealous about the other women! He does text me sometimes and he seems happy to talk with me, but I just don't know if I should continue to pursue him. I'm worried he's a player and he'll take my "guy virginity" and then not speak with me anymore. Is it normal that I'm jealous about the other flirty girls even though I don't really have a claim over him yet? And what course should I take now? I'm not entirely sure if I'm looking for a one night stand, or a more regular thing. But do you think I should continue to act interested?

Voting Results
67% Normal
Based on 18 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    Wait until his divorce is final before you do anything.

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  • Mersaphe
    9 years ago

    sounds to me like you're jealous of the guy getting all the female attention and that in a weird way makes you attracted to him

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  • CountessDouche
    9 years ago

    I don't know about this...if losing your "guy virginity" is significant to you, I would definitely hold off. 99 times out of 100 a guy will be "interested" in you if you blatantly offer sex, but it sounds like this guy is interested in all female attention. It doesn't sound like he see's you as someone special. It doesn't sound like he has pursued you because you mean anything to him...so, unless you want a one off, I wouldn't do it.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Like I just don't want to seem too "easy" to him. I don't wanna sleep with him if he's not even willing to charm me and spend some time with me first. I guess I acted on impulse by telling him I wanted sex, I shouldn't have been so forthright.

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      • CountessDouche
        9 years ago

        Lol- trust me, he won't care if you seem "easy," if this is just about sex. Ultimately, you need to figure out exactly what YOU want from this relationship, you need to know what YOUR expectations are. Ultimately, YOU are the one giving something to him, so if you go ahead without being sure about exactly what it is you want from him, you have a 50/50 chance if being very disappointed.

        ...if you expect him to care about you or expect him to not sleep with other women, then I would definitely hold off. If you just want sex, then go for it, although I would wait until his divorce has been finalized, at the very least.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          9 years ago

          Thank you, your advice helps :) I didn't expect to get any serious answers on here, but I needed the advice pretty badly... I'm new to all this stuff

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          • CountessDouche
            9 years ago

            I'm glad to help! I hope everything works out!

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Thanks for the input... I mean it's not like i could date him anyway, my parents would never approve of him. So I guess it has to stay casual. But I still want him to at least care about my feelings a little... Should I hold off on the sex for now and see how much effort he puts into me? I don't really want to share him with other women even if we're just sex buddies, but I guess it's silly for me to be possessive. I was invited to have a threesome with another couple I know, and I still plam to do that, so it's not like I'm gonna be totally focused on him either.

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  • Diver2
    9 years ago

    Suck the man off for crying out loud.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      I plan to do that if we ever get to sleep together lol.

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  • Anonymous Post Author
    9 years ago

    The question isn't really about if this is normal or not, I just need opinions on whether I should pursue him or not. I want to stand out from the other girls who are flirting with him.

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    Such a weird scenario.

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