Is it normal that i always fall back into depression?

33% Normal
6 Comments

A lot of amazing things have happened lately - I spend the majority of days with my dad (whom I've rarely seen throughout my life), I have an amazing boyfriend I can share anything with and not be judged, half my life is spent high as can be...
And yet, I'm not sure if what I feel is happiness or I'm trying to fool myself. Or I think back on something stupid/terrible I did and feel like I don't /deserve/ happiness. I sometimes think I'm better off dead. Whenever the lovely above-mentioned distractions are gone, I immediately start to think like this again and want to curl up and die. IIN?

Voting Results
33% Normal
Based on 21 votes (7 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    The thing about fooling yourself into being happy is that it actually works.

    There are many times I do something I'm not in the mood for and I force myself to have fun, but when I do I even fool myself.

    If I were to do fun things and give into being in a bad mood then I would just be pissed off all the time.

    But if I make myself have a good time then I not only fool others that I am having a good time, but I can even trick myself.

    Emotions are often a self fulfilled prophecy.

    I'm not sure if it works like this for everyone, but it does for me.

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    • Gonfaloniere
      9 years ago

      I think your method might work for shaking the blues off that tend to get to most people once in awhile, but for people who are severely depressed, there's no energy to pretend anything.

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  • DubstepismyMJ
    9 years ago

    Everyone makes mistakes. Its part of life. Its how we learn. Shit happens.
    Sure you can try to ignore it and pretend it doesnt exist which i think is stupid. Or you can face it head on and realize were just humans. Everyone. Fucking everyone makes mistakes. Especially when were younger.

    Whats important is to learn from it. And learn how to forgive yourself. You have to love yourself to some extent in order to do that. From what ive read, you lack it hard. Seriously learn to love you.

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  • daydreamer394
    9 years ago

    I feel the same ... but I don't have manic depression.

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  • TareBear20
    9 years ago

    I go through the same thing. It's called manic depression. It sucks, but you can teach yourself to have better control over it. Find something to keep your mind busy. For me, it's music and video games. :) Remember that you're beautiful and your boyfriend loves you very much. I think of my boyfriend when I'm feeling down and it makes me smile. ^___^

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  • Short4Words
    9 years ago

    I feel this way all the time but I'm starting to get better at enjoying it while it lasts. If you're in a good mood ride it out, take it for all you can. You can't afford to think about the past anymore, so as soon as you do, shift your focus to the now. And do things that make you happy. Even the hard stuff, that's where fulfillment comes from.

    You deserve happiness, no matter how much you try to convince yourself you don't. We've all done good and bad things. You're no different. You seem to have gratitude. That's a wonderful virtue. Remember that about yourself.

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