Is it normal not with my ex because his penis is too small

39% Normal

I realise I'm going to get a lot of hate for this post but here goes.

My ex-boyfriend is a wonderful person. Truly beautiful inside and out. He is loving, caring, strong yet sensitive, clever, everything you could want in a guy.

Except that his penis is small. I didn't feel pleasure when we used to have sex. Before you say it's not what you got it's what you do with it, I tried EVERYTHING - I love him, I wanted the relationship to work. Everything. I researched like crazy. I just could not get the satisfaction from him. It's not that my pussy is loose - he would say when we had sex, oh my god your pussy is sooo tight...but he just doesn't satisfy me in the same way. I really do not know what to do. He still loves me and I would be with him in a second if it wasn't for this problem. I was with him for five years even though I got no satisfaction from our sex life. I just feel like sexual attraction is the difference between a boyfriend and a friend and slowly I stopped feeling attracted to him because of the bad sex.

I honestly don't know if sex isn't a big deal and I ought to take him on his personality - but like I said, surely sex is the difference between a boyfriend and a friend? What should I do? I care about him so much...is it normal not to be with him because of this issue?

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39% Normal

Based on 18 votes (7 yes)

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Comments ( 26 )

(.)(.)boobies

9 years ago

With that reasoning lesbians wouldn't be able to get off and should breakup with each other because their dicks aren't big enough.

Aside from that, most females require clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm. That means the male's pelvic area should rub against the female's clit while he's inside her, or either one of them can stimulate the clit with their hands or toys. A boner sliding in and out of a vagina, regardless of the size of said boner, very very rarely brings a female to orgasm.

In porn, it shows the male going in and out without any pelvic contact, that's ONLY for the camera to get a better shot of the genitals. Porn is not a realistic portrayal of good sex.

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- (.)(.)boobies
  
  9 years ago
  
  It could be that I didn't explain it clearly enough. But the point I was attempting to make is that there are other ways to have a sexually satisfying relationship if you are actually in love with someone.
  
  To answer your original question: no, I don't think it's a 'normal' reason to break up with a man because you think he has a small dick.
  But why are you asking this question if you don't want feedback? Or did you only want comments that were supportive of dumping guys based on their dick size?
  
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    9 years ago
    
    I guess the question I really want to ask is how important is sex in a relationship? When it comes to advice on working around it, trust me I've tried everything, I don't need tips. My fault for not making my question clear enough in the OP.
    
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- Crusades
  
  9 years ago
  
  Women are as frigid as a wooden board. Nature did a pretty shitty job creating them.
  
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  - (.)(.)boobies
    
    9 years ago
    
    It's so sad that your experiences have lead you to that belief.
    
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  - Sog
    
    9 years ago
    
    Hey, I thought you said your account got banned...
    
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Lesbians don't want dick, but I'm straight and I do. Also, lesbians who do want that sensation use sex toys and I can't really ask him to fuck me with a dildo, that would be cruel. It's not that I expect to orgasm vaginally, it's that the sex isn't enjoyable, whether I come or not I like the feeling of a guys penis inside me and I just really don't feel his when we have sex. :(
  
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VirgilManly

9 years ago

Maybe he was just being nice when he'd tell you you're tight?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  I don't think so, as he'd also ejaculate in about 2 minutes flat. Also, his penis is small, and I don't need a big dick, just an average one. Honestly, I feel shitty and disloyal even talking about him like this, but my pussy isn't the problem, his dick is.
  
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seakelp

9 years ago

I know you can get those rubber/plastic penis extender sheath things. Pretty sure at least.

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(s)aint

9 years ago

I would not have been with a guy with a small penis either (Small= WAY below average)
Sex is important to me and I want to be able to FEEL it nearly tearing me apart, which I do with average and up.

To your issue: As others have said you guys CAN use toys, but it wouldn't do it for me because I want the real deal.

A thing you COULD try could be to have him wear a strap-on over his own cock and then use the strap-on in your vagina whilst his own cock could go in your anal. This way both of you get pleasure during.

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Mersaphe

9 years ago

He is too good for you and should dump your shallow ass. So he had an ex who dumped him because of his small dick? You won't be the first to make him feel that way. I'm sure you'll be happy with yourself because you don't deserve a guy like that who will treat you with respect and love you anyway. Just accept the fact you're a terrible human being with no regard for others feelings. Break up with him asap so he'll know not to be too invested in this relationship because you're just not worth his time. I'm sure some girl out there will appreciate him for who he is even though you can't get over the size of his penis.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  We are broken up already, that's how come he's my ex :) to be honest, I hope you're right, I really love this guy and I want him to be happy. He deserves someone who loves him for who he is and I wish more than anything that I COULD get over the size of his penis. I have a lot of regard for his feelings and would never say anything belittling to him about his penis size, that's why I came on here for advice. I was left ice-cold by the things his previous ex said to him about it and would never want to hurt him in that way. I understand why you are angry on his behalf, I'm honestly ashamed myself but that's why I came on here anonymously rather than being an asshole to him about it, so I don't think that I'm a terrible human being. Can you honestly say you've never refused to be with a great girl for aesthetic reasons such as breast size, physical appearance, etc? I very much doubt it.
  
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  - Gspyder
    
    9 years ago
    
    Hey, if satisfaction from intercourse alone is necessary for you to be happy in a relationship then it is right for you to find someone who can do that. What you need in a relationship is your business, just play nice and don't tell people that's why you ended it. You don't need the community of this site to validate your choice.
    
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  - Mersaphe
    
    9 years ago
    
    I don't consider the size of a girl's boobs or butt, her weight (as long it's reasonable and not obese), her hair color or ethnicity or any number of shallow characteristics as deal breakers when it comes to how attractive I find her. Attractive women come in all shapes and sizes. Of course everyone has dating preferences but I would not turn down a great girl if her other features and personality traits lined up with what I find desirable, even if she didn't fit ALL the ideal things I look for in a girl. Sometimes imperfections can make a person more attractive. I understand where you're coming from though, that the sex was really important to you so his penis size became a huge issue in your mind. Maybe I was a little hard on you.
    
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    - Rusty-Rider
      
      7 years ago
      
      Maybe you were a "little hard on" her.
      LMAO
      :-)
      
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ajayllg

9 years ago

how about maybe your vagina is too big...have a doctor sew it up if you love him

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  :)
  
  It's not that. It's definitely his penis. You seem kinda angry, do you suffer in this department as well?
  
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  - ajayllg
    
    9 years ago
    
    proud member of the tri-pod community i am.
    sounds like all your lips are flapping and delusional because you said i seem angry but i never said a word!
    your imagination is as wide as your vaginal cavity it seems :}
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      9 years ago
      
      When you immediately blame me, when I've already stated I'm not the problem, it makes you seem kind of irrationally angry. Try and stick to the facts of the story.
      
      I'm 5'2 and when I get my cervix examined, the doctor has to use a small speculum, rather than the normal-sized one. My ex has a really, really small penis. That is a problem. Do you have any actual advice or are you just enraged by the idea that small penises exist in this world?
      
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      - ajayllg
        
        9 years ago
        
        my professional advice is to buy him a strap on dildo.
        its his only hope....and remember tell him that he wears it not you.
        
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Avant-Garde

9 years ago

Maybe, his body isn't producing enough testosterone? He should see a doctor to get his production levels checked.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Thanks for the advice but I don't want to hurt his feelings by making him feel inadequate. He's 28 so his penis definitely isn't gonna grow any more and I don't want to make him feel bad by telling him he needs to stretch it. His ex was really mean about his penis size and I don't want to hurt him more. I know some girls can come with guys of any size, I just struggle to orgasm anyway so this size issue is a real problem for me. I don't want him to feel like he's incapable of giving pleasure, if I was super-orgasmic anyway maybe it wouldn't be an issue.
  
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Avant-Garde

9 years ago

Did you try the legendary Swedish Penis Pump?

I hear that a man can gradually stretch his penis by pulling on it. I don't think that mere rubbing does the trick. He would have to pull it outwards.

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RoseIsabella

9 years ago

Okay, now you've peaked the interest of my inner troll. About how many inches are we talking here?

Maybe more oral sex? 69 can be mighty fine.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  it's not really the length (which is about 5 inches), it's more the girth, which is very very narrow. more oral is a good tip but it just doesn't replace dick! if i was satisfied with just oral i would seriously be with a woman as they are better at it lol
  
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Is it normal not with my ex because his penis is too small