Is it normal my sex drive is eating me alive

74% Normal
8 Comments

So I'm a guy who is in my mid 20s and I never had a girlfriend and I'm a virgin. I have a job but I don't have many friends or anything that could be called a social life. And all I can literally think about is beautiful women. It just consumes my daily thoughts. It does suck yes, but I can pretty much control the urges with frequent masturbation. The problem is when I see couples in real life and that rips my heart out from the inside. I go on vacations with my parents and younger brother and I feel like a total loser idiot because everywhere I look there are couples completely in love with each other and being cute together. I absolutely cannot stop staring at all these beautiful girls and gorgeous women and it physically hurts me that I can't have any of that, that I can't get to experience a girl loving me and caring about me and laughing at my stupid jokes. I seriously fantasize about most of these young women I see in public especially at vacation destinations during the summer, whether these young ladies are by themselves, with a friend of the same gender, or with a boyfriend. I try to memorize what these girls look like, their face, hair, clothes, and shoes - so that I can try to remember and visualize being in a relationship with them. It's not that I even want sex so much, to me it's much more about the emotional aspect compared to the physical, I just wish I could find a gilfriend who would make me feel wanted and like I actually matter.

Voting Results
74% Normal
Based on 19 votes (14 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • sillygirl77
    7 years ago

    Hi there. Are you a very shy person? what kinds of things have you tried to meet women?

    I felt your pain reading your post. It sounds like you really value love and companionship. A lot of women would love that. That's why I'm wondering what types of methods have you used to try to meet potential girlfriends.

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  • Ellenna
    7 years ago

    If you genuinely want to change this aspect of your life you're going to have to take some risks: the women you see around didn't just materialise on the guys' doorsteps, those guys would've been out and about and actually meeting and talking with them.

    You need to get out of the fantasies and take some action, starting small and then progressively taking a few more risks until you can actually ask a girl you like out.

    Good luck, I hope you're able to take some steps to change this before it becomes a lifelong ingrained habit you can't break later on.

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  • AbnormallyAwesome
    7 years ago

    I've been there, man. I feel you.
    It seems impossible but all you got to do is stop waiting. Make a decision to become a desirable man. You're trapped in your sense of self as a "total loser idiot". You're not. You can be a cool, attractive and charming guy who's good with the ladies. You know how that guy acts. You've seen him a thousand times in your fantasies.
    All you gotta do now is become this version of yourself and not give a fuck what anyone sais about it.
    Talk like you want to talk, dress how you want to dress - Don't let these things be determined by how others view you.
    You can reinvent yourself if you only want to.

    All you have to do then is go talk to women you like, look them in the eyes, smile and treat them like a person - Be interested in who they are.
    It might not work the first time, but fuck it. Practice makes perfect.

    You can do it!
    Best wishes from a guy who used to be you.

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  • Carlton03
    7 years ago

    Man I feel your pain, I'm 27 yr old Virgin, barely had a girlfriend and don't really talk to women in a sexual/dating sense, I'm also extremely shy but have been told I was apparently cute by a few girls, I just can't really talk to women, I have a job and life goals and barely and friends but good relationships with my family most of them so yeah, I don't really care too much about sex, we are seriously Similiar, where are you from? I'll be your friend, are you on Instagram or something, please answer me :-)

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  • Storm9
    7 years ago

    Hello. I think part of your problem may be that you are objectifying women, and yes, women can sense that. And they can also sense a low-self esteem. I am a very attractive woman, going on what I have been told all my life, and what women really want is for someone to be interested in who they really are on the inside. I overcame a shyness problem when I was younger, and it took Herculean effort to do so, but it IS possible. It all starts with a "Hi, how are you?".. Believe that or not, but it's true. Not all women care about 'looks.' There are many, myself included, who would rather have a loyal man that doesn't have addiction problems such as alcohol, drugs, and pornography. Good luck to you.

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  • McBean
    7 years ago

    Dude. I feel your pain. I have a very wretched appearance. I have never gotten girlfriends either. Keep masturbating. Maybe have a "lot lizard" at a truck stop suck your cock every now and then.

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  • mysistersshadow
    7 years ago

    You have to put yourself out there and risk rejection. Not many women esp beautiful ones are going to approach you. Get involved with something you have a interest in that women do as well and opportunity will be there.

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  • riffraffy
    7 years ago

    Keep this in mind: the key part of interacting is 'acting'. This mindset will give you confidence in approaching and meeting women.

    You need to get attractive. For a girl, this is the only difference between a creep and a cutie. 10% bodyfat, hit the gym, get a tan. Being attractive makes every aspect of your life easier.

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