Is it normal if i want to let him go but can't?

Basically, I haven't built the courage to let go of that "toxic" person. I plan to and want to, but my heart still holds the power over my head so I'm still here. That toxic person isn't always a bad person, so let me clarify. He's just toxic to me because he's not giving me what I need emotionally and I'm just suffering inside. He's a good guy but he's not ready to be a bf. Some reasons/excuses I can think of are he was in a long-tern relationship before me so he prob wants to be single but still wants to be w me, he wants to focus on his career and finances, he is long-distance, and yeah. The only reason why I have stayed around is cause I love him so that makes me weak and vulnerable. All I want is to be with him. But my head is slowly taking over but hasn't reached power yet. I'm slowly starting to crave that courage to finally leave him and not give a f*ck. Right now, I do give a f*ck if I let him go. Not only would I possibly hurt him but I'm hurting myself and later I'll be like "you idiot, why did you have to let it get to your head when everything was fine?" I'll feel this guilt and torture and knowing me, it takes a while to get over things which is why I love communication cause it helps clear things out. But in this case, I would lose touch w him and have to deal w it by myself. So now I'm just waiting to finally build that courage to let go and confidence to know that I'm not going to feel bad about it. It sounds like it would be easy to just let go cause I want to so bad but no...its easier said than done when the heart wants what it wants and holds the power at the moment. My heart has def lead me to experiences I thought I wouldn't go through but love is crazy and I wish my love for him was finished so I can move on but it's still there so now I'm just waiting.