Is it normal if i like the feeling of crying ?

I've never cried so much over someone before. People know me as this tough person and yeah its true I wouldn't let my guard down and always let my pride take over. I was so hard and sometimes heartless. I loved it cause I knew i didn't have to be worried about being broken. But then I realized one day I wanted to feel something real. So when I met someone I really liked and saw my life with, I decided he's gonna be worth it...I'm gonna let myself go to him and be vulnerable so I can have the full experience with him and all the depressed times I was getting myself prepare for would be worth it. But damn be careful what you ask for cause you will get it and wish you hadn't ask for it in the first place. I have been destroyed to pieces, l lost hope, I feel like a piece of crap, my back hurts from all the stress, etc. I get so surprised when I start crying again because I honestly feel like I've cried the most i can that there's no more tears left but I guess there is. However, I guess that strong side of me is picking me up very gradually and right now im better than I have been. It feels good but sometimes I get sad and I can't cry and I kind of want to. I wanna feel that realness and spill it all out. At the end of the day, it felt good to be vulnerable; I felt alive and human. So yeah sometimes I just wanna cry to feel good. Is this normal ?