Is it normal i want to de-friend someone but am afraid it will look bad on me?

77% Normal
8 Comments

I've known this guy for a few years and more and more lately I am realizing how we should just not be friends. He is not that bad of a guy, but he is constantly pointing out my faults, condescends enough times, and even barks orders at me. I am simply naming the worst parts of this friendship but he's been helpful and considerate of me before. But maybe that's just over now. I just feel like there's a wall between us and we don't get or jive with each other but we keep forcing get togethers and every time I seem him I want to open up on him but it doesn't feel right. I'm afraid if I end this friendship people will think it's unchristian of me, or makes me somehow less of a person because I can't maintain a friendship, but it literally does 0 for me. That's how I know it should end. I gain nothing from it at all.

Voting Results
77% Normal
Based on 22 votes (17 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    Have you tried talking to him about it? If he has helped you in the past, then I think he deserves a chance to change his present ways. Talk to him about it, tell him how he makes you feel and the things he is doing that maje you uncomfortable, and if he doesn't change after that, then tell him you nolonger want to be friends, and no that does not make you a bad person.

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  • green_boogers
    8 years ago

    Won't you become more of a person if you unfriend him? Take charge of your life. Be pleasant but firm.

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  • SubstationSubCurb111713
    9 years ago

    It's an interesting point that comes from friendships being defined online. While we seek to be seen online and known, it means the negative sides of things are also seen and known, such as relationships we don't want.

    To be honest, I'm not sure how you deal with it because the internet is still pioneer country. Although, I would say that the way humans behave is the most important thing, regardless of what medium we are in. If you feel you don't want this person in your life, go with what you feel.

    Whatever sphere we find to communicate and exist in, we're still all people and we still all have the same feelings we've always had. Not liking someone hasn't changed just because the internet was invented.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      I didn't mention anything about it being online but thanks for the advice.

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      • SubstationSubCurb111713
        9 years ago

        Sorry, I made an assumption that de-friending was an online thing because I've only heard it in that context. I think you should ignore my advice because it was given with that in mind.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago

    Is it possible for you to gradually phase him out and fade away? I know it's not the most upfront way to go but if you're uncomfortable it's an option. Ideally, it would probably be best for you to try to talk to him and voice your concerns.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      I did. It didn't go horribly but it didn't go well either. Well see what happens. And thanks for the advice.

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  • CoraCook
    9 years ago

    Get rid of anything that feels like deadweight.

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