Is it normal i screwed up college and jobs for sex and feeling inferior to men?

46% Normal
9 Comments

I was the only female in my major at college. I was good at the subject and I could have really excelled but instead I blew it!

I guess I had an inferiority complex and didn't feel comfortable being seen as good or better than the males in the class (even though I WAS better than many of them). I ended up hooking up with a guy in my class and school became more about being this guy's bitch rather than focusing on my studies.

I passed and graduated but I could have done so much better, I really fucked up and can't do-over. It seems so stupid now, but even if I could do-over I'd probably still act and feel the same way because of how I was raised (men are superior to women). It's just not 'in me' to show up a man (unless he's a real blundering idiot and it's seen as 'OK' with my colleagues), even though I KNOW I can.

How can I get over this? I'm really talented at my job but I have this internal struggle from a lifetime of being told women are inferior and are sex objects that I just can't break from. Being around men all the time, they are pretty crude and to be honest I AM interested in some of them sexually as they are with me as well and things become all muddy, this is ridiculous.

IIN?

Voting Results
46% Normal
Based on 91 votes (42 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • pappusharma
    11 years ago

    It is normal for anyone to think this way because of the education system, or maybe cultural values. Men are told to be holding superiority that women.
    But really you are a 21st century girl, look around you there are so many women making a mark in every field, they are proving that the ideology of 'Men superior than Women' is wrong, it is being shown to the world that women can do anything what a man can do. So just be positive about yourself. If you think you are above all then why think about someone else, fuck the saying of older times, you are superior to all.
    Be positive dear.

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    • KeddersPrincess
      11 years ago

      ^This is everything I wanted to say. I totally agree 100%.

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      • pappusharma
        11 years ago

        Thank you. I just tried to put some light on reality...
        If i am missing something please add to it, it will be helpful for her..

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        • KeddersPrincess
          11 years ago

          You're welcome :) I don't think there's any more to you need to add. You pretty much hit the nail on the head!

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  • hybee
    11 years ago

    It's normal, but you must get over it and stop sabotaging yourself.

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  • lmh
    11 years ago

    Wow. Thank you for asking this. I can relate, it's like you're telling my story.

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  • robbieforgotpw
    11 years ago

    Are you from a middle eastern country that suppresses women?

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  • kinklu
    11 years ago

    In olden times, life was dangerous with all the wild animals trying to eat you and all you had was a club. Men, having larger muscles than women on average, were very valuable and enjoyed high status and power back then. Today, muscle power has little relevance. it's becoming obvious that women are overtaking men in many areas and it leaves little doubt that they will achieve at least full equality.

    I suspect that in government they will be better at negotiating since they tend to be co-operative compared to men whose weakness is that they are so confrontational. You see, you are at least equal to men if not, indeed, superior as my wife seems even now to believe.

    You are not alone in failing to realize your potential to the fullest. I had a high IQ and could read when I started school. But I f****d up royally in college by drinking, carousing and trying to take a different woman to bed every night.

    Long story short, I quit college, lost my credibility as a potential employee, and went to the bow wows in a hand basket. One of my girl friends, Valerie, handed me a book entitled, "I'll Cry Tomorrow" and the rest is history.

    Realizing I must be doing something wrong, I sought help, made a 180 degree turn, found work and worked my way through college and grad school which took about many years.

    I made it back most of the way to a house in the affluent suburbs and all that sort of baloney, but I can never fully regain the ground I lost from such foolish behavior. So you are not alone. Enjoy the rest of your life and live today. I hope this is of some comfort to you and I'm sure you'll do well. Roar a little.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Thanks for your post! Your story and your advice is very inspiring. I keep telling myself I need to act as smart and capable as I know I am but I feel like you must have felt at one point, as if I was too far behind and had done to much damage to bother trying to do any better. But that's not true, it's never too late I suppose, I need to get on track. Maybe if I can find one small step I can take to get me started in the right direction, the rest would come along. I tend to think of this situation as too big to tackle but thinking of it one step at a time, one day at a time would probably help.

      I wish I could understand how nonsense like sex and silly outdated tradition can cause me to act so destructively though.

      Thanks again.

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