Is it normal i hate my vagina?

17% Normal
17 Comments

I have really large labia lips and it's humiliating. I'm even embarrassed to type this out even though it's anon.
I mean, they are really big. You can definitely tell through underwear. If I am wearing tight underwear/clothing then it makes me feel numb. Sometimes it's uncomfortable to sit down because I can feel them squishing and contorting and pulling. On occasion, the skin has split open where they join and I have bled quite heavily for a number of hours (was too embarrassed to go to the hospital).
When it comes to sex it can be uncomfortable/awkward. I can have sex but I know I'd be more confident having sex if I was happy with my appearance down there. Recently, I have met a man who I have become very close to and we have an incredible bond. He's the one I want to spend my life with. But I just can't let him see my downstairs. I'm too scared to be sexual with him, and I'm never like this with anyone else. I just can't let him see me like this. I can't let him see how ugly it is. I can literally tell this man anything and everything, but I just can't let him see that.
I am thinking about booking a consultation with a surgeon because I can't deal with it anymore. But it will be a while until I actually have the surgery and then a while until it's safe to have sex. There's only so many excuses I can give this man why I can't be sexual with him. It's ruining my life.
Is it normal to feel this way?

Voting Results
17% Normal
Based on 6 votes (1 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • deepthought33
    9 years ago

    Well, being open with him about this is the first step even if you don't show him until after the surgery. The constant excuses will be so much worse for your relationship in the long run than just keeping him in-the-loop.

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  • Shackleford96
    9 years ago

    You should look at this and understand it:

    http://www.greatwallofvagina.co.uk/home

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  • Negima93
    9 years ago

    Just tell him your problem. Just say you are uncomfortable about how you look down there. If he's going to judge you on that, then he's not a very good person. If he won't judge, then you have nothing to worry about. Although if it's causing discomfort I would see a doctor. Good luck

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  • Fall_leaves
    9 years ago

    I wouldn't get surgery, there are way more complications that can come with that. Don't change your body for someone else, talk to him and he'll be understanding.

    Everyone has something they're insecure about but if you're with the right person they won't make you feel insecure over your body.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      I'm not having the surgery JUST for him. 90% of the reason why I'm having it is because I can't cope with the pain any longer when the skin splits open and bleeds heavily for 3 hours and when I can't wear certain types of clothing.

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    Except for the tearing and bleeding! That isn't normal.

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    Learn to love your V/L. The labia come in all shapes, sizes and colours. Unless it is green or yellow, there's nothing wrong with it. :)

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  • derpyderp
    9 years ago

    By the way OP, I sort of rushed over the part where you said this actually causes you physical pain & bleeding.
    That's a good reason to consider surgery or some sort of remedy.
    Looks alone aren't a good reason IMO

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  • derpyderp
    9 years ago

    Tell him & you might be surprised.
    It might not be an issue for him.
    Some guys honestly like that...

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  • anti-hero
    9 years ago

    Based on looks or stigma I wouldn't say this. But since it is causing you discomfort and physical pain. Maybe you should see if you could have them reduced.

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  • bleach_baby
    9 years ago

    Chill, almost all vaginas are ugly, he prob won't even notice, you're just comparing yourself too much to porn.

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    • derpyderp
      9 years ago

      Vaginas are ugly?
      You must be female?

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      • bleach_baby
        9 years ago

        And you must be a virgin?

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        • derpyderp
          9 years ago

          Yes, must be ha...
          Because only a virgin could possibly think that vaginas aren't ugly right?

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          • bleach_baby
            9 years ago

            Aha! You're clever, you understood my comment and then reiterated it in simpler form!

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            • derpyderp
              9 years ago

              Damn straight I'm clever!

              & hey, if yours looks like week-old roadkill I'm truly sorry to hear it but they're not all like that.

              I don't think that telling the OP she has an ugly vagina, but it's OK because everyone else does too, is right when there's a lot of people who would disagree with you. Myself included.

              Done with this conversation...

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