Is it normal i get so insecure about my boyfriend's past sexual relations?

76% Normal
7 Comments

My boyfriend is 23 years older than me so of course he has far more experience than me sexually. He never left his hometown & it seems he has slept with more than half the women in it. Sometimes when we go to a party the chances of us running into someone he's slept with is more than likely. I always have to ask him.. "Did you sleep with her?" & he's always honest with me. I can't help but feel insecure and jealous of his past. Even though the past is the past, and he's with me now, I have a really hard time dealing with this. Is this normal? & How do I cope with this?

Voting Results
76% Normal
Based on 54 votes (41 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I think it's pretty normal, myself. Sex is a bigger deal than we make it out to be, just by the nature of the act. So it's natural to TREAT it as if it were a big deal. But obsessing over the past isn't good for anyone, so if you want to remain with him, you'll have to find a way to deal with it.

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  • shade_ilmaendu
    11 years ago

    You just need to remind yourself that the past doesn't exist anymore, and he's not with those people for a reason.

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    Wooowww.. That would be like living in a town full of your boyfriends ex's. A close equivalent to hell I would say..

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    I had a friend just like you he didn't like the fact that she had more partners (sexually) than he did.

    This is what i told him.

    If you really like this person look past this. I know it may be difficult but you can't let what has happened in the past affect how you feel about someone.

    Or something to that affect.

    As a result he has been married to that person for 5 years now.

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  • squeallikeasacofpigs
    11 years ago

    Hahah, if you keep on saying 'Did you sleep with her?' he is going to dump your crazy ass so fast!!! That's some high school bullshit.

    Dude all that shit is in the past, you can't change it or do anything about it. Chill out. All that matters is that he's yours now. But not for much longer if you keep on being a crazy bitch!!!! COOL IT DOWN!

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  • kelili
    11 years ago

    I understand what you mean because I live in a small country and everytime I go out there is 50% chance that I'll fall on one of my boyfriend exes and on his side it's the same. I have learned to make with it even if one time it was really difficult because we were at a party and one of his ex was there. The bitch ( yes she's s bitch) was , "Can you please pass that plate(my bf name's?", "Can I please have some sausages (my bf name's)?" etc.. I did a great effort to control my nerves.

    In the beginning of our relationship I was reluctant to go out where we'll meet lots of people because I did not want to run in one of his exes but now I simply don't give a damn. He's with me and we are quite happy.

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  • VioletTrees
    11 years ago

    Why do you keep asking? That doesn't seem healthy to me.

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