Is it normal i don't understand "friends first and see if something develops"

Being friends first helps you develop a strong foundation for the relationship, whatever type it ends of becoming. A strong foundation is key in whatever you are building.

I don't think its ideal.
If you are 'friends' then you both may find it strange to get physically involved if your feelings are not for sexual attraction.

If you have sexual attraction (or at least one of you towards the other) then I feel you can't really just be friends.

Yes get to know eachother, but if a girl said to me she'd rather be friends first, I'd be thinking she's just not interested. I mean as a friend, does that mean she could start something with another guy at any time? Even if you are both out together as 'friends' only? I think that's gotta cut you a little, unless you are just friends!

If you feel for her more than friends, then let her know, and say let me know one day if you ever feel the same towards me. Until then I won't be able to be friends without thinking more of you. Then kiss her (cheek, or forehead) and walk away.

If you decide to stay friends with her in the hope that one day she'll see more in you. I think its unlikely she will. Some tiny possibility, or some major cut feelings when she does find someone during your friendship. Hello, you are JUST friends!

It means that you are just friends. Why would it mean anything different? If you are friends you go on friend group outings, y'know, kind of like a friend. You don't do anything physical because it's kind of like a friendship in the way that that's what it is. A friendship. You've got to ask her out all over again some other time if you want anything to happen later, just like any other friend.

If you want it in totally different words, it means you're rejected but not ruled out. Some people are only comfortable being in a relationship with people they can trust, and the best way to do that is by being friends first.

That's just in my experience though, and I wouldn't call my experience reliable, normal or extensive.

Not everything has to be immediate like bang, bang, bang. The "friends first" thing is more about taking your time to get to know someone and, in many cases, to find out whether you want to pursue something.

We all rush into relationships with people and then start finding things we don't like about them. If the things cause enough incompatibility, you break up, feelings are hurt, etc., etc.

Why not avoid all that by learning about someone before committing to a sexual relationship? I'm not suggesting a relationship is as impersonal as a business relationship but you wouldn't pick a business partner solely on them catching your eye one time. Why be frivolous in love?

I'm playing devil's advocate here, by the way, because of the people I've been with, it's been a minority of times that we've been friends with the idea of one day something more. I have done it on occasion, though.

A "normal one" than physical intimacy is shared. It's way not normal to bury those feelings in favor of anything. Leads to all kinds of misunderstanding and fights. This is why so many girls get cheated on. They expect monogamy from a 20 something guy and aren't putting out themselves lol. What do you THINK is gonna happen?

It's what girls say so they don't get judged as a whore, even the ones that are looking for a hookup say it. It's an unnatural way of doing things in my opinion. You were physically attracted to one another to begin with, why not keep it in order? I sideline women that say crap like this so fast. Not because I'm a chauvinist pig, but because it's extremely important to a relationship

Manure of power

Just so you are aware, if you have the intention of taking this relationship into bed, friends first doesn't qualify as an opener. However, some women have been hurt before! Some have put their hearts on an exposed string and had it trampled by some A-Hole lowlife. If that's the case communication is the best solution. You can ask about her past and find out what happened. You could also be really bold and just come out and tell her your desires (her). Talking first is the best way to go due to the unexpected revelations she might let slip. Being too bold would frighten her away. Not a great move in your scheme of things. Just stay cool! Get the answers before you move for the pounce. And most of all STAY COOL!!!

I agree it is quite shady in general. I believe that either you are sexually interested in a person or you just do not see them as possible relationship material. I think that people play the friend card to have a back-up for lonely or insecure times.

Guys and girls do it. It's something you do when you're not just looking for someone physically, but emotionally. I mean, you could look at a girl and go, damn, she hot! But then you get to know her and she's really mean and has no respect for herself. Hence, "friends." It's just a means to get to know someone better and see if they're even worth calling your gf/bf

It probably works well for some people, but I don't get it, either. If the attraction between you is strong enough, I don't believe that "just friends" will work.

You're friends until you DTR. so.. yeah. simple.

I think it is pretty self explanatory.

I know it's irrelevant but our writing styles are slightly similar. At least to me they are:P.

Anyway, my initial thought after reading the phrase was that it might end up as either a friendship or a relationship. To be honest, I've never even heard it until now, so I'd be willing to bet that I'm wrong. That's just how I read it:P.