Is it normal i crave this treatment??

40% Normal
7 Comments

I'm disabled, female, really short, no strength, wheelchair-bound, stiff muscles (very painful) and I suffer with anxiety. I sound as if I'm speaking through cotton wool.
There's a man where I live who is also disabled but in a different way; he can walk but he's got severe behavioural issues.

He is obsessed with blood, gore and violent things happening to people. He talks about the nastiest, most disgusting stuff ever and, since this is literally ALL he can talk about, he doesn't seem to be well-liked in our care facility. Then he says he's going to do one of said things to me in this creepy raspy voice while looming over me.

My legs go all watery and tingly and I relax totally, clench my wheelchair seat, gasp and pull faces. I just melt. I love it. even thinking about it makes my legs tingly. I'm not anxious anymore, and all is right with my world.

Why would this relax me -- is it because i'm in pain anyway?

Voting Results
40% Normal
Based on 15 votes (6 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • herpesfreesince93
    7 years ago

    It's a good thing that you are in a care facility and getting all the care because I don't care.

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  • TexasToast09
    7 years ago

    There's so many different questions that are brought up by everything you said, so there's a lot that could be said or asked. I guess what can be said is that you may like the attention you are getting.

    I think more importantly, since there's so much missing context, is that you should make sure that you feel safe, and that you are safe, are your highest priorities.

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  • Drugsmoker666
    7 years ago

    What violent things is he going to do to you?

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  • pyralspiteful
    6 years ago

    There's no explanation that I'm aware of, but as long as you're not getting hurt, it's fine

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  • Justmehere
    7 years ago

    As long as you don't get hurt and are safe, the thoughts are ok, I guess. Probably compensating for the lack of physicality. I dated a woman who, at first, would tell me "I like when you tell me what to do", then, changed that to "Tell me what you want to do to me..Be violent with me..Make me hurt".. I found that just a bit strange and not what I wanted.

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    • Pseodonihm
      6 years ago

      Right! I also found that a bit strange.

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      • Justmehere
        6 years ago

        The woman I dated who was into choking is what I found not only strange, but, an absolute NO... Pushed her right off me.

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