Is it normal i can't stop thinking?
I really wish my life was way more simplistic. I dont even feel like i do anything with my life other than sit around but i still feel like i just have to much on my mind. Its really starting to affect my sleep to. On a good night i'll be able to fall asleep within 45-80 minutes. Bad nights it'll take me 90+. The main reason for this is i just have to much to fucking think about! The second i lie in my bed i go thru a process of things to think about. I first make sure all my homeworks done than i figure out what grades i need to get better. Than i start thinking about what schools i should apply for with my grades.. But wait? what degree do i want? do i even want college? WTF do i wanna be when i grow up? this normally goes on for about 15 minutes. Than once i get that out of my head i realize the reason im not sleeping is because im thinking to much.. I try tricking myself now. I try to make my mind go completly blank but i cant because im thinking of myself thinking to try an keep it blank.. So i try that for a bit but doesnt work. Than i start thinking about girls i wanna fuck that go to my school.. Bad idea cuz now i gotta go up for a quick wack off session on the computer that kills another five minutes. But no, now ive been exposed to computer light which fucked up my whole sleep cycle so now i gotta start over. Lay back down an come to realize i really need a hobby? what should i do? will i be able to get my friends to do this hobby with me? how am i gonna get the money for this hobby? i need a job. where should i work? than im right back on track to wondering wtf i wanna be when i grow up. If im not thinking about that than im playing scenarios in my head.. What would happen if i were to die? would i be missed? how many people would care? what would my life be like if one of my parents died? or maybe ill get a scenario of if i won big in the lotto. how i would just piss in everyones face that was ever a dick to me, and how i would make sure me my family and friends would never have to worry about money ever agian.
Anyways you should get the point. Theres way to much shit on my mind and i cant sleep when its all bothering me. Does this happen to anyone else besides me?