Is it normal herpes

So i posted recently because a new partner infected me with the herpes virus. Since then, I have done a lot of research - it seems to be an incredibly common and harmless thing, but one which has huge stigma attached.

It seems to me that if everyone who had viruses like this admitted it, there would be no stigma attached and life would be less painful for those who have it (the majority, and the vast majority of whom don't even know, according to statistics). There's a lot of misinformation out there - but basically, if you ever had a cold sore as a kid, and then had oral sex with someone years later, you've exposed them to herpes. Even if it was years ago. So shouldn't we just get over it?

On the other hand, I think people should disclose their herpes history to partners (cold sores, genital herpes, whatever). If we all talked more, it wouldn't be such a big deal, and people would accept it as a spot on their genitals and decide whether they were ok with that or not. If the guy who infected me had told me, I would have waited longer to have sex with him, decided whether we were compatible and it was worth taking the risk, and then made an informed decision. I think it should be on the same level as knowing your partner gets angry easily, or lies, or has a controlling mother - something slightly unpleasant, but normal, but something which you should have a choice about getting involved with. IIN?

Voting Results
54% Normal
Based on 46 votes (25 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 18 )
  • handsignals

    I never thought I would ever say this, never ever.

    I don't feel like a blow job right now.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • gashlover

      lol

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • peterrabbyt69

    I have a dog names "Herpes" and he won't heel.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • motherlovebone69120

    This is one of the things that make me think twice about being with a man. As much as I want to try gay sex and explore my fantasies, if I were to get this, I don't have any idea how I would explain it. Yes, of course they should tell you first if they know they have something, but how many don't know yet.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Then why don't I have herpes breakouts in my mouth, balls, or asshole yet? I have never had a cold sore. I am sure I have...encountered...some who have had them.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • The vast majority of people who carry the virus don't show any symptoms. Do your research, it is truly terrifying

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • Meh..people can have HIV or syphillis and go without symptoms too. I know these things. I predict that I will die in a vehicle accident sometime in the future. That is more likely to happen.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • If you've 'encountered' (by which I assume you mean had sex with) people with the virus, you've got it too. How you're going to die is irrelevant.

          Comment Hidden ( show )
            -
          • Well I don't know for sure that I have. But just because you have sex with someone infected with an std does not mean you will contract it from them 100 percent of the time. It all depends on the persons viral load at the time and the health of your immune system as well. I may have it I may not. All I know is that I have never shown symtoms of having it. That sucks that you have the sores and have to deal with them now.

            Comment Hidden ( show )
              -
            • Thanks :) it's cool though, I think we all see mad pictures of tramps with HIV and untreated herpes eruptions and think they actually look like that! whereas for me it was an 'ingrown hair' which didn't go away so I got it checked out. Like a litte red pinprick. Most chicks who wax have ingrown hairs most of the time, so just cuz it's a contact disease, what's the diff? After the initial shock, I got zen about it fast :) still not following the guy who gave it to me and spreading it willy (wink) nilly though! I give guys the information and see what they reckon - you'd be surprised how few care!

              Comment Hidden ( show )
  • CountessDouche

    It's a shame, OP, there is always a stigma attached to the notion of any sexually transmitted disease, which is especially true when people have little knowledge about it. I've never contacted anything, YET, but it's highly likely that I will- just look at the stats on HPV.

    It's good that you are educating yourself about the subject; this will help you have reasonable conversations with future partners.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • shuggy-chan

    i had Oral herpes (cold sores) when i was a little kid, so i always assumed i was born with it. i think like 1/3 of adult or something close to that big a percentage carry the virus

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Way more. Apparently more like 80 percent carry one form of the virus or another, and the vast majority don't even know. Cold sores have always been viewed as harmless and incredibly common, but they can be transmitted to the genitals just like HPV 2. Crazy, right?

      http://www.herpes.org.uk/art_kinghorn.html

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • shuggy-chan

        you may had already had it, but just not on your...more delicate parts

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • Yea, but if you get with someone who had it on their lip ever they can give it to you on your genitals through oral sex! Even if they havet had a cold sore in years. It's completely crazy.

          Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Smokyjo

    I would say never touch a woman coming back from the continent she will be red rotten, Believe me I know what I'm talking about, I fancied this girl In our office she went to Greece on Holliday's one night with the bitch I had herpes from a blow job ,? Sickening ,

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • I got it from a Greek too! goddammit! on the other hand, pretty much every one i knew had cold sores as a kid, and anyone who has ever had cold sores, even years ago, can potentially give you genital herpes completely unknowingly through oral sex. so don't be too hard on the chick. I think it's probably not that big a deal behind closed doors - just the kind of thing everyone likes to make fun of in public.

      Comment Hidden ( show )