Is it normal he isn't ready for a relationship but doesn't want me to leave?

It's possible to have strong feelings for someone and still want to put your own needs first (which can include being single).

You want a full-on proper relationship and you want him to want the same... But, that's not what he can give you, in spite of how he feels for you.

Decide on what you want and go for it, yet don't expect him to change to meet your expectations.

I can understand this...but it sounds a little bit selfish. I would ask for more communication... Does he want the possibility of seeing someone else...on the slight chance in could happen? He wants commitment w/out actually having commitment.

It seems to me he should either choose to be in a committed relationship with you or not be in a committed relationship with you. If you guys aren't in a committed relationship. You do what you want and he does what he wants...and there isn't a problem.

He's trying to blur those 2 worlds....which leaves him open to . . .? something?

It makes sense to me that he feels this way.
I would want to know a girl for a long time if I were to consider having a relationship again.
You cannot get to know someone that well that quickly and it's more logical to know someone for a long time if you are considering spending your life with them.

This guy sounds very childish. You might be better off to get out of this now before things get even more confusing and silly.
Personally I don't think this guy is mature enough to be counted on as a friend, let alone a partner. I'm sure you can do better, with lots less drama.

I was in a very similar situation with my now ex. He said all of that stuff, and treated me like it was a chore to see me. (We lived 2 hours apart) I later found out that he cheated on me during the short 3 or 4 months we were dating. Sometimes people say that to their SO and that's their way of trying to get you to break up with them. Like he is trying to not hurt your feelings. There's also a chance that he means what he says. Relationships are very confusing sometimes.

If you're really in an exclusive relationship, and you're comfortable that he acknowledges the essential elements of that status, then fine. Let him call it whatever he wants. Caution, though, to make sure he's not just trying to create some bullshit loophole to cheat on you, or lie to you. Make sure he knows that if he's out with other women you're not ok with that, and it will end whatever relationship you two have.

Have been introduced to his friends/family before? If not, the reason for this is that he's embarrassed to say to them that you're his girlfriend.

He likes you, but he doesn't want to put a label on it because then he'd have to deal with what everyone else would say.

Either that, or he's trying to get with someone else and you're the fallback plan if it doesn't pan out.

I can relate to your boyfriend.

I think it is very possible to not be ready to have a relationship. I am at a point in my life where having a boyfriend is stupid, and I am not ready for a "relationship" with labels and ties, but am fine with something looser, like having a person in my life who I truly care about and who I am committed to...just without the label. It is something more primitive than the typical relationship. Of course your boyfriend doesn't want you to leave; he cares about you. If he is anything like me about this, it's a hard feeling to accurately explain to other people.

It's hard to explain. I was actually in a relationship when my mindset shifted to where I do not want a relationship, just a partner, and I couldn't even explain it to him well then.

Take everything you consider a relationship to be, zoom it out, fuzz the lines, don't think so hard, and loosen it up. That's what having my (and it sounds like your boyfriend) mindset feels like. Sorry if that all seems like a mess.

One of those titles I just wish I hadn't read, because it sapped me of energy.

it sounds like your in a relationship and it seems like he acts like your boyfriend i dont understand what he means