Is it normal for me to feel hurt, what bestfriend tell me about our friendship?

38% Normal
3 Comments

my friend and I been friends for 22+ years. We met in college. After college, she and boyfriend move to ky. but never stop us from staying touch. I flew to KY twice to see her. Even, though it was so hard for me physically disable. Not, once did I ever complain,I wanted to see her. I been disable all my life. They been married and have 8 yrs daughter. She sure has a busy life now, which I have accepted. Never missed,our birthdays, holidays, or any other special occasions. We been there for each other thick and thin. Then, during the holidays, she didn't call me or sent me a card. It's not like her to miss to send me card or call me. I knew she went to her HK to visit her family. Her dad is very sick, but told me,will be back by x-mas eve. On chritmas day, called her, no answers, called again on new years day, like we've done for 22 years, again no answers. I thought about her dad and thinking, maybe she staying to HK longer. I have left 3 message,didn't respond to any of them. two weeks,still no responds. On Jan 3, I finally got hold of her,asked her how her dad is doing,then why she hasn't respond to me. Well,day after, she sends me very hurtful e-mail. Saying, I was demanding,and she doesn't owe me any explainations and i was acting like childish. Which I didn't, thing I was demanding,but even if I did sounded demanding, is only because I was so worried about her family. I responded to e-mail and explain why & how I was worried. Also,every once an while, i call her,always telling me that she's busy. Well, anyway, I got second e-mail, and was even more hurtful. She told me, that She was never were my best friend with no hessiataton, she told lot of other things and how she really felt about me all this year. I asked her, why she telling me now, after 22+ years. She said, that, she's doesn't want to stay in touch, until I call her and appolize. I don't think, I did anything wrong, other than worried. Any advice for me. Thanks.

Voting Results
38% Normal
Based on 39 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • suckonthis9
    12 years ago

    Although you feel that your friend is in the wrong, which I agree with, do the right thing if you wish to preserve your friendship. Your friend is under much stress because of her Dad's illness. This is why her behaviour changed suddenly. Do the right thing and apologise. Do it in writing, carefully. Tell her, in your own words, that you were insensitive because you did not understand what she is going through. Very important, let her know that you are there for her, when she needs you. Do not harass her. Give her time and space. Do not get upset if she does not respond. She might, in time.
    In the meanwhile, try to meet new friends. I understand that this is not easy for you.

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  • karmasAbich
    12 years ago

    There are two sides to every story, but that's ridiculous and sounds to me like you deserve much better. Don't apologize unless you feel you did something worth apologizing for. Your friend may have a lot going on and is misinterpreting your intentions, but that was an immature way of her to deal with it.
    I'm sorry to hear about this. Sounds as if you deserve a bit better.

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  • kellstar79
    12 years ago

    Your friend sounds like a total bitch! If she can't understand why you were so worried maybe ask her how she would have responded if the situation was reversed. It's sad to say but sometimes the longest and best friendships have to come to an end. As for apologizing, by your post I don't see anything you did wrong except for being concerned for her and her family and if that's a bad thing then I'm guilty as well

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