Is it normal for a man to secretly take pictures of another man... everyday?.

9% Normal
27 Comments

So a friend of mine takes secret pictures of me and it really creeps me out. He constantly invites himself to my home. He never really talks is always depressed lost his job, car, hates doing guy stuff we use to do but loves taking these secret pictures of me, creepy. He's been doing this for years. I was over at his house one time and there was all this pictures of me on his PC screensaver. When I say creepy secret pictures I mean under his leg, though my screen door weird stuff. He makes secret vines, snapchats, tweetpics, uploads photos of me on his instagram secretly. The worst part is he invites himself over to my house constantly to do this. I hate to say this about friends but it feels kinda like a curse.

Even after mentioning how uncomfortable it makes me feel in my own home. He made it clear that he didn't respect my thoughts on the matter and would not stop secretly taking pictures of me. I no longer return his calls, don't answer the door but my elderly grandmother whom I care for always just lets him, even though I tell her not to. Apparently feeling uncomfortable about another man secretly taking pictures of me makes me a bad friend. He now tells my other friends how terrible of a friend I am. And not to hang out with me unless he decides its ok.

If he wanted to watch the game like the old days. Or go to a bar and get some wings or, shoot some hoops it would be great but nope he just wants to sit in my home and take pictures of me.

Maybe men all around the world secretly take pictures of other men and Im just the weird guy that doesn't?.

Thought I'd ask.

Voting Results
9% Normal
Based on 107 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 27 )
  • VirgilManly
    10 years ago | pl

    That's really fucking weird.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Amen

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  • thr
    10 years ago

    How about frisking him for cameras and confiscating them for the duration of his stay at your place?

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    • [Old Memory]
      10 years ago

      Haha the guy might come over more often for the free frisk! I agree though.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    I'm surprised you still want to have him as a friend at all, let alone have hope that he will want to eventually do normal activities with you.

    Are you the only friend he takes photos of or are there others? If he does it with everyone then maybe it's a hobby and not nearly as creepy as it sounds in your story.

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    • RealWord
      10 years ago

      Well, he clearly stated the act makes him uncomfortable and this "friend" of his, shows no regard for his comfort OR privacy. If someone tells another person, stop/you're making me uncomfortable, then fails to stop and continues to force their own obsessive behavior on the person, it's definitely "odd", creepy and not normal. He has a multitude of images, taken secretly, has him as a screen saver and shows up, to the reluctance of the OP.

      This is harassment and borderline stalking behavior. I would consider really telling him to back off, as he sounds obsessed with you. This is probably sexual, for him. Unless you are interested in him progressing this matter into something you really do not want, I would suggest spending time a part, if he continues, you may need to get a restraining order, as you don't know what he is doing with or to, your images. Showing up unexpected and not caring how you feel about it, also very telling of his intentions. Men taking pictures of people without consent and failing to stop, knowing you know about it and are uncomfortable, definitely is not a normal thing to do and shows a lack of acknowledgment; right vs wrong, normal vs abnormal behavior. He seems like a stalker, who is just getting started.

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      • Anonymous Post Author
        10 years ago

        I honestly don't feel he believes he's doing anything wrong. I often question his mental stability.

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        • RealWord
          10 years ago

          He does this with other people? That makes everything a touch different. But doesn't exclude this form of fasciation with you, specifically, or others.

          He doesn't sound mentally stable; But mentioning he HAS been institutionalized, this could become increasingly dangerous. If he fixates on someone, in a prying manner, obviously it can only become more of a problem for himself, as he is evidently not stable enough to control urges. This could be how he gets off, for now. But a mentally unstable person, will only find more ways to fill an urge/desire, to reach the same effect/satisfaction, level. If it is male-specific, he could be attracted to men and struggling with that. Even if not, he has two recipes for disaster: mental health issues and a fixation; you're allowing too much leniency with things, thus far. If things escalate, you could have a real problem on your hands. He could hurt you, himself, or someone else, someday.
          It's not fair to him, if someone knows his situation and will not work with some type of therapies, or get to the bottom of what his intentions are. I know it sounds "dramatic", but in actuality it is not. People who commit crimes of "passion" all started somewhere, with someone underestimating the nature of fixation and compulsions of someone struggling with mental health issues. It might not seem "wrong", the act of what he is doing; it is the nature behind his action(s), obsessive behavior, fixation, showing up with no notice, pictures being taken everyday (the prying nature of how they are taken) through the screen/window/under legs, that alone is disconcerting; adding the element of not being mentally stable. That is something to take action over, soon.

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  • gummy_jr
    10 years ago

    I think he wants the D

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  • disthing
    10 years ago

    This is so bizarre.

    I love it, though.

    The idea that you and he hang out, but that consists of you sitting there uncomfortably whilst he takes pictures of you at different angles.

    "Yes... YES! MAKE LOVE TO THE CAMERA! *click* Do that shy glance to the left again. *click* OH THIS IS GOLD. Don't stop. *click* Lift your chin a little... Come on give us a little pout."

    "Jim, can't we just go bowling or something?"

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  • thegypsysailor
    10 years ago

    Are you really that desperate for companionship that you need this guy at your house making you uncomfortable? It seems you don't even like his company any more.
    I don't get it; why do you let him come over to your house?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Known him since we were kids so 20 years, we're in our 30s now. Life's dealt him a bad hand. He's been institutionalized before. The part of me thats a good person (its a very minute part) finds it hard to reject someone in need.

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      • [Old Memory]
        10 years ago

        Hes a lost cause let him go.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    He sounds like he has some fixation on you, something almost stalkerish!! Don't stand for it any longer, you don't like it yet don't seem to enforce any punishment. Tell him to leave your house next time he does that, and be utterly serious. I imagine it would be a bit like teaching a child that something is unacceptable, and until there are consequences, he won't stop. Explain the situation to your friends, because there is no way in hell they could find this normal!

    I have to agree with Avent-Garde as well. That crap is illegal and you could turn him in.

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  • Jfdp
    10 years ago

    You have . . . interesting tastes in friends

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  • Caryopteris
    10 years ago

    Obsessions like that seem to end in violence.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      A friend of mine who knows him says "he has some kind of infatuation with you crap like that is friendship ending". I don't want to end up beating him up or anything like that.

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      • Caryopteris
        10 years ago

        Exactly. The violence could come from him out of jealous rage or it could get you so upset you get provoked.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          10 years ago

          I do admit when he has his phone pointed at me I think is he doing it again?. I want to rip it out of his hand and throw it against the wall. That is his world, without it I think he'd just loose it...

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          • Caryopteris
            10 years ago

            Not your problem. Cut him loose.

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  • Sog
    10 years ago

    That's... very strange.

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  • Avant-Garde
    10 years ago

    I would report his actions to the police and get a restraining order. Give them the links to his instagram and other online profiles that have these photos. What he is doing is illegal.

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  • Complex18
    10 years ago

    Give him a taste of his own medicine. Take pictures of him with a Polaroid and paste them all over town.

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  • MerlinDaMagician
    9 years ago

    This is normal.

    you guys should just all get togeher in a big naked pile and have a photo shoot. Be like 'yeahh honey thay pose leg up a little', 'no dont worry evry one dose this mike its wat freinds are for', 'dose standing at this side make me look fat?', and the only san guy in the room be rocking back and forth with his hands over his hear like 'this aint happening this aint happening this aint happening'. Then granny walks in to tell u teas reddy sees whens happening be like 'well finaly he agreed to let the creep picture him, can you take the camera in the shower dow now bill? Theres a good boy' and slowly walks back out.

    sorry but you should get your 'freind' help coz this I creepy shit.
    While ur at it I would check around your house for secret cameras, you know how freinds can be watching you shower and stuff.

    This is weird, I say you tamke your freind out to the woods, tie him to a tree and drive away

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  • Gunkmunky
    9 years ago

    Of course it's normal. What are you, some kind of prude? I have cameras set up in change rooms and public washrooms all over the place. I have set them up where I know my 'special guy' goes. He doesn't know about it, but the day is coming when I'll let him know I've been watching him.
    Oooh, I can't wait.

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  • Razaa
    10 years ago

    being uncomfortable in your own home is like the worst thing ever.

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  • handsignals
    10 years ago

    We like sports and we don't care who know's, right guy No.1 right guy No.2

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