Iin: every guy i'm attracted to is already taken?

94% Normal
4 Comments

So, I just started college. I love it so far. The people are pretty okay, but I'm not that involved in the college life as much as other people, since I commute.

It's still really early so this is probably too soon to say but, I feel as though a lot of guys I've had the pleasure talking to a bit, or find attractive for whatever reason, I find out they're already in a relationship. Their relationships started from high school and their significant other goes to another college/doesn't attend the same college.

It makes sense that I would find a guy attractive personality-wise when he's already taken I suppose, since he's already attracted someone else...but it's like I get mixed signals sometimes from guys and I never got the impression they were in a relationship.

The first guy grew on me, as we had conversations and he is a genuinely nice guy. He was in my class and has a girlfriend from high school and I just found out by Facebook after the class already ended.
Yet to me, we seemed to have some sort of connection since day one of class. But don't get my intentions wrong! I would never go anywhere with him given his relationship status....but it's just disappointing, you know?
(I understand some might think I'm misconstruing his niceness for attraction, but I felt something gosh dang it!)

This is coming from a girl who's never had a proper boyfriend. Never gone out with a guy. I've always been the type to not be able to even talk to guys (on rare occasion it was possible) without clamming up and ending up avoiding them once I started having feelings for them. And if the guy started having feelings for me and I found out, I'd also avoid them. I hate being shy, but I can't help myself.

Now that college has started, I want to start getting more comfortable talking with guys, but I feel like my luck is pretty shit thus far.

....single lyfe 4 evr ha ha....*cries*

Voting Results
94% Normal
Based on 18 votes (17 yes)
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Comments ( 4 )
  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    If you've never had a proper relationship, obviously you're not really accustomed to reading signals from guys all that well, and there's nothing wrong with that, but I caution you that you're setting yourself up for dissapointment if you're going to read too much into the situation every single time a guy is no more than genuinely polite or friendly with you. You need to learn how to distinguish between a guy flirting with you, and a guy being friendly. Believe me, there's a fine but firm line.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Yeah, I've found that out. It's hard to find out that distinction without being too upfront. As I said, I'm a shy person so I wouldn't be able to do that too easily. But yes, I definitely understand that line, especially when the guy is already in a relationship.

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  • Toball
    9 years ago

    Well I'm one of those semi-shy nice guy types (so my friends tell me or tell me to stop being to be more accurate) so I can understand where you're coming from but as everyone around me and on the internet has said you got to keep trying. You got to be strong and put yourself out the a little bit more, be a bit bolder, you have to want it just a little harder! ...And here I am still single. Ultimatly they're right it is up to you (a bit of luck and good timing doesn't hurt though). I wish you luck and strength fellow shy person.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Thank you kind sir!

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