Is it normal clenching the seat

i'm a disabled girl, wheelchair-bound,. I have a flatmate who towers over me, threatens to end my life in increasingly nasty ways –- his reason being that he says he hates me.
His favourite thing to do is tell me stories of what he would do, or rather neglect to do, if he was paid to care for me. He could do it if need be but he wouldn't. He says he'd build a basement for me to live in, leave me to rot in my own shit, force me to drink acid, keep me dehydrated (I need to drink loads), remove my catheter so I constantly piss myself. He's moving out in a couple of months, or so he says.

Every time he says these things my legs pulse, my muscles go loose, I pull a face. My legs feel wonderful, all light. I've even cried afterwards and begged him to keep going, to make his stories worse. I feel so relaxed afterwards. I've lived in many a care facility. I know what good & bad practice is, I've lived through it.

We call this “clenching the seat” as that is what I end up doing.
i'm a disabled girl, wheelchair-bound,. I have a flatmate who towers over me, threatens to end my life in increasingly nasty ways –- his reason being that he says he hates me.
His favourite thing to do is tell me stories of what he would do, or rather neglect to do, if he was paid to care for me. He could do it if need be but he wouldn't. He says he'd build a basement for me to live in, leave me to rot in my own shit, force me to drink acid, keep me dehydrated (I need to drink loads), remove my catheter so I constantly piss myself. He's moving out in a couple of months, or so he says.

Every time he says these things my legs pulse, my muscles go loose, I pull a face. My legs feel wonderful, all light. I've even cried afterwards and begged him to keep going, to make his stories worse. I feel so relaxed afterwards. I've lived in many a care facility. I know what good & bad practice is, I've lived through it.

We call this “clenching the seat” as that is what I end up doing.