Is it normal after 2 years my boyfriend still havent show me where he lives?

7% Normal
29 Comments

I have been with my boyfriend for 2 yrs and he havent show me where he lives. He says he lives with his 2 sons ages 21 and 18. He says their mother doesnt live there. He has never introduced me to his sons. This makes me suspicious and damages my self esteem. I see him sat and sun nights b/c our work schedules and he lives 40 mins away from me. He does sleep over. This is not about me feeling that he is cheating on me at all it is about having doubts as of why. I dont want to be wasting my time on energy in thi relationship if things are not going to change. When I ask him, he says I'll meet them someday. About the house he only answers saying its only him and sons there, but never tells me why.

Voting Results
7% Normal
Based on 87 votes (6 yes)
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Comments ( 29 )
  • Goomats
    11 years ago | pl

    He might be married.

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    That doesn't sound normal at all. Just as Goomats said, he might be married. You should probably be mindful of yourself when you're with him.

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  • la_uva_mojada
    11 years ago

    Two YEARS? You're kidding us? can't believe u haven't insisted to see where he lives by now! He is OBVIOUSLY hiding something. Wake up, girl!!!

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  • Unimportant
    11 years ago

    Did he at least tell you his name?

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  • Mando
    11 years ago

    That stinks but better to keep and address this as fairness, transparency and a "next level" bigger picture thing. He could be hiding something - but more likely he is stuck at a level that he is comfortable with while you, rightly, want progress.

    2 years is long enough to **** or get off the pot. Time for a big conversation spelling out what you want and him telling you just what are his intentions. Go for couples counselling, or go yourself to firm up your position and feelings first, if you think it will help to have a skilled 3rd party.

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  • sYki
    11 years ago

    Maybe he lives in a dump and is embarrassed to show you.
    Maybe they have a marijuana grow op in the basement.
    Maybe he lives in a really nice house and wants to be assured you want him for him and not him for how well off he is.
    Maybe he fears something might happen between you and one of his sons from them being at "that age".
    Maybe he doesn't feel comfortable bringing a woman around his sons other than their mother, from guilt how it might make them feel, and he's waiting until they move out.

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    • cupcake_wants
      11 years ago

      Okay, one of those scenarios COULD be possible, BUT dont u think two years is excessive when they have a sexual relationship ?

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      • sYki
        11 years ago

        Yes, I do think 2 years is excessive, it still doesn't make any of them less possible, except maybe the nice house one. I can only pretend to know this lady and assume that all or even just parts of the last one makes the most sense.

        OP, do you know what happened to the mother/ex-wife?
        Was it a divorce or did she pass away? Do you think and/or do people often tell you you are attractive, physically and as a person?

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  • Justsomejerk
    11 years ago

    Get his address off his licence and surprise him.

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  • littlemonster605
    11 years ago

    He's hiding something

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  • BlueJeansWhiteShirt
    11 years ago

    No, he is hiding something. And keeping secrets in a relationship is far from a good thing.

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  • JustDave
    11 years ago

    Run away!This guy is hiding something.

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  • jethro
    8 years ago

    He does not want you to meet his wife. I would find someone new if I were you.

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  • FireStone
    11 years ago

    I don't really think it is normal.
    I think he is hiding something, but it may just be something he is ashamed of, like as someone mentioned, he is embarrassed about his 'shit tip' living conditions.
    I would not stay in a relationship like this.
    I would be sensitive and a little patient towards the issue, although I would also make it clear that if it continues on that way, I will begin to grow suspicious, lose trust and move the hell on!

    Also, the fact that you have been together for so long and have never met his sons is a little suspicious. Definitely look more into it.

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    • dummyme74
      11 years ago

      Thank you

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  • Fartyr
    11 years ago

    He probably doesn't want to introduce you to his wife and kids yet .

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  • AngelUnderCover
    11 years ago

    He's either like saying up above: having an affair, lying about something, hiding something or doesn't trust you yet.

    Either way its been two years this does not bode well for you.

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  • MulticolouredRainbows
    11 years ago

    Hes probably cheating girl so get your Miss Marple head on.

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  • blue_burr
    11 years ago

    2yrs!!? Hahahah he played you so hard better make sure you don't end up getting knocked up or something stupid!! Ask him about the mother of his children such as how long they haven't been together!? Leave his ass save yourself from the hurt of meeting his real wife. Search his pockets or car for the ring.

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  • saywhaat
    11 years ago

    he's a bum

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  • dummyme74
    11 years ago

    I do know his address but I will never show up were I am not invited. He says that someday; the mother of his sons has keys to the house and goes when she wants to see their sons. My boyfriend told me there are pictures of her in the house and her stuff is still there but that is because she has been staying at family members since they broke up and doesnt have a place of her own yet. All of this time he spends weekends with me.

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  • CraneyCrow
    11 years ago

    Lady, this philanderer is married and living with his wife. There's no other reason why he's hiding you. Dump him!

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  • manii92
    11 years ago

    That man is either married or living with his mom.. I wouldn't even allow myself to be left in the dark for 2 whole years like that lady.. You either demand to see his home or tell him your leaving and if if he still doesn't change his mind move on.. A relationship should have no secrets if you guys are serious.. Good luck hun.. And please come back and update what happens

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    • dummyme74
      11 years ago

      I spoke to him and he said the house is of both of them thats why he doesnt show me.

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    He could be living in a shit tip and he doesn't want you to see it.

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    I read this and my mind keeps saying. "you're his mistress!!!" You may just be a woman on the side, and he has a family. It's just way to fishy..

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  • Leigh30
    11 years ago

    This guy is obviously hiding his other life from you. Why are people so ignorant and use people like this. Good luck I think it's time to move on.

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  • valisque
    11 years ago

    You can't be this gullible.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    hell stay at your house someday, he'll go out with you someday, he'll have sex with you someday , there's your answer , not today but someday

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