I worry my husband may be abusive

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12 Comments

Yesterday my husband went out for a beer. Which I am totally cool with. He said he'd be home around 3 pm. He arrived at 650pm. I tried to call I txt. No answer no response. I kind laid into him when he got home. Somehow it became about me and everything I had done to him. And I end up saying sorry. Hes done it before. Says he is going to the store and comes home 3 hrs later. I know he at the local bar or his buddies but all I ask is that he let me know. And everytime we argue eve is always my fault. How can that be? I askec him to be nicer to me. He even says maybe the fact he is not nice is my fault. Help!! I've also asked him to take me on a date and he says he can't afford it but hes been to the bar at least 3 times this week. He says he only has 2 but it still hurts.
Hes not all bad. Sometimes he is very helpful and supportive. Which makes it all the more confusing.

Voting Results
13% Normal
Based on 48 votes (6 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • ChuckFiIdren
    8 years ago

    You delete our comments, we delete your post. deal with it ho.

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    • rpnsandy
      8 years ago

      It says I have a right to delete comments

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  • tntom
    8 years ago

    He is abusive and you should leave him as soon as possible. Also he may not be at the bar with friends, but may be cheating on you. Which again you don't deserve. there are abuse centers for women, and you may need to seek one out that will help.

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    • rpnsandy
      8 years ago

      I'm a little scared. We have kids and CAS is supervising. Which according to him is allll my fault. He threatens that if I leave he'll tell cas about a couple relapses I've had and I will lose the kids. My cas worker even tells me I can do better.

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      • RoseIsabella
        8 years ago

        Relapses?

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        • rpnsandy
          8 years ago

          I drank a couple timez and I'm not supposed to.

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          • RoseIsabella
            8 years ago

            Well, if you want your life to improve you need to take your recovery from addiction very seriously.

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  • Extra_official
    8 years ago

    Your husband definitely sounds abusive. I recommend seeing someone. Go to one of them centres that help people with there problems, and get opinions and tell your story.

    What your husband does when he leaves for them times isn't clear, and hope it isn't the worst. Drinking can seriously damage relationships and marriages.

    Just don't blame yourself, that's the worst you can do.

    Good luck

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  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    Sounds like he's got a honey on the side and you are being relegated to maid/cook status. After all, the help ain't supposed to question the boss man, are you?
    Are you going to apologize when he blames you for his infidelities, too? Get a grip. It's time to throw the asshole out. You can do better.

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  • amyxox23
    8 years ago

    Yes, he sounds like he could be an emotional abuser. Anyone who blames their faults on you isn't right. My ex was like this. I used to ditch my friends, and missed out on time with family because of him. He lied to me, called me constantly and got mad if i didnt answer the phone and asked me to change my voicemail to say why i wasnt going to be available to answer...i was 15/16 years old so i did it...looking back i was an idiot and wish I could have ended that relationship much sooner. But they make you feel guilty, and make empty threats.

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  • mysistersshadow
    8 years ago

    Doesn't sound like a healthy situation. :(

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    • rpnsandy
      8 years ago

      It's not and I'm not sure how to make it better. I try and stay sober but find my relationship soo painful it's hard.

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